An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation
 
An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation
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The Mormon Church needs more missionaries who can adequately speak with their hands

By Heather B. Armstrong April 4, 2005
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  • joy

    Ha!

  • Lilla

    Oh Lord, first?

  • C

    I don’t get it…

  • Lilla

    It’s a Mormon thing…

  • I don’t get it either. It’s a cool picture, though.

  • top ten. now I can sleep.

  • 7.45pm Sydney Australia time… so this is when the magic happens…

  • Lilla

    Wow, jordan you’re hard core, man. It’s 10.45am in London…

  • Ha, I just saw noticed that one of the google ads says, “Mormon turns porn star”. I wonder if it’s referring to the movie Orgasmo ??

  • Katherine

    top ten? It can’t be. I’m willing to come out of lurkerdom just in case though!

  • ah only 2:52 am here … but I’m still hard core, right?

  • I know I’m a bit late on this one, but I love the new layout!

  • Katherine

    12.35 Tel-aviv time. At last I know when to check!

  • Katherine

    Sorry that would be 12:35 PM. Silly.

  • Petra

    Even more exhilirating than being first, LAST!!

  • Kinda like what needed is the four fingered salute, maybe. Like the new look! go Mrs Armstrong.

  • How come all the Mormon Missionaries who come to NZ wear black suits and ride bicycles… what’s up with that? Makes it easy to spot them and not answer the door… although sometimes it’s nice to talk to someone from home (they’re all Americans). One time, a couple of young lads came to the door, and I regaled them with stories of my time working in SLC, and having a tour of the (outside of the) Tabernacle… they’d never been to Utah themselves.:)

  • A

    Could we call the shape that his fingers make Gynecologist Hands?

    Thanks.

  • Henryk_

    A gynecologist with a nervous condition?

  • at least they’re well-dressed Mormon missionaries. I guess.

  • Henryk_

    Welcome back H & L

  • Liv

    Loving the new masthead!

  • kris

    Good morning all. It’s funny to me how many Mormon photos, sayings, and references are found on this ex-Mormon’s site. Mormonism (is that the right term?) must be akin to Catholicism in that you can leave the church, but it’s always still with you in some form, yes?

  • Henryk_

    I agree, once you leave, you either continue to hare it….or you continue to hate it!

  • What a sexy Mormon!

  • Henryk_

    Get it? Mammary. MAMMARY!”AHHHHHH, memories!

  • lex

    dont get it either

  • Henryk_

    He was holding an apple, gogads or something like that but doesn’t realise it’s gone??!!

  • Liking the new masthead.

  • Harry

    A busier and more rustic design?

  • Too early in the A.M…. Nice new masthead.

  • Harry

    Ah!…almost time for wakey, wakey!

  • I’m loving the new masthead, particularly the surrounding pattern. Nice picture by the way, but I am also missing the commentary. ::sigh::

  • Harry

    O M G!! They killed Kenny!

  • Harry

    Today, we write our own captions!

  • Henryk_

    1 tequila, 2 tequila, 3 tequila, floor!

  • Cheryl

    They say there’s something special about a man that uses his hands when he speaks… 🙂

  • I wonder how often they paint that church.

    Nice hands. Does this mean Jon is becoming a missionary?

  • Henryk_

    It all depends on who he is talking to!

  • And photographers that can shoot on an angle.

  • Are you sure he’s not panhandling? Or pimpin’? “I got one pretty lady, nice, you like, you never think of Utah without twitches in your pants again.”

  • Henryk_

    Oh Shazza, you have gone!

  • Henryk_

    Oh h…..Bucky4E is finally awake!

  • Henryk_

    a penguin walks into a bar and askes the barman
    “do you have any fish”
    the barman looks at him and answers
    ” no its a bar we only serve chrips and beer
    the penguin walks out. the next day the penguin walks in
    “do you have any fish”
    the barman looks at him
    “i told you yesterday we only serve chrips and beer”
    the penguin walks out only to return the next day
    “do you have any fish”
    the barman now angry tells the fish
    “look i told you the other day no we dont serve fish we only serve beer and chrips an if you ask again i will nail your flippers to the floor”
    the penguin walks out again, next day the penguin returns
    “do u have any nails?”
    the barman looks at the penguin and replies
    “no”
    the penguin looks hopeful
    “ok then… do you have any fish???”

  • We don’t get too many Mormons up here in Canada, more Jehovah’s Witnesses. Friday I had one guy WAIT for me to pull in my driveway, then he WAITS for me to get my kids out of the car, then he is all, “HI! IS THIS YOUR SPOON? HA HA HA!”
    He found a spoon on my lawn. I was like, “yep. thanks. bye.”
    Then he tried to show me his magazines about the end of the world. I just kept walking away.

  • natalia

    do you guys actualy get out of bed or stay up on purpose just to leave a comment on the top n here ? not that that isn’t a good enough reason 🙂

  • Henryk_

    No Natalia, I am waiting to go to bed ( 10:05 PM Sydney time)

  • 8:06 Am here.

  • Henryk_

    Tuesday almost here

  • natalia

    wonder if Heather wakes up to do it or has a clever script to do it for her just to see how far people would go to be first 😉

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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