Heater, Mother of Lance

Well aware I can’t dance

My next piece about “So You Think You Can Dance” is up at Alpha Mom:

“As an adult I have no illusions that maybe with wisdom I picked up a little rhythm. But that hasn’t stopped me from moving to music any chance I get, often while drinking and in front of large groups of frightened people. I dance not because I think I’m good at it — I know I’m not — but because of my love for it, and more than once someone has taken a picture of me pulling a move I learned from John Travolta and posted it to their website, usually with a caption that says, ‘Something tells me this woman is drunk.’ Interestingly, the way I move my body while intoxicated is no different than when I am sober, which is why I am lucky that a cop hasn’t ever pulled me over and asked me to walk in a straight line.”

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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