the smell of my desperation has become a stench


“I’m thinking I want to sing ‘Faith’ by George Michaels.”

“George Michaels?”

“Yes. George Michaels.”

“There’s no S on Michael, Maggie. His name is George Michael.”

“When did he change his name?”

“He didn’t. It’s always been George Michael. It would only be George Michaels if there were two of him.”

“And there is only one.”

“Just one.”

“Wouldn’t it be great if there were two of him? Because then we could have had WHAM! without the lame guy.”

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

read more