An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

If your colors were like my dream

Carol: “Who is this? Culture Club? Is that the one with Boy George?”

Me: “I’ll never forget the first time I saw the cover for this album, I remember thinking how much I loved her eyebrows. And my friend was all, umm, that’s not a her.”

Carol: “Do you hear these lyrics? It’s a bunch of gibberish.”

Me: “Carol, Culture Club was never supposed to make sense.”

Carol: “I just don’t understand any of it.”

Me: “What don’t you understand about ‘red, gold and green… red, gold and greeeeeeeeen.’?”

Carol: “Oohhhhhh. I thought he was saying, ‘Wear gold and green.'”

Me: “Wear gold and green? Are you serious?”

Carol: “Maybe he’s singing about the Green Bay Packers.”

Me: “Oh my god. Boy George did not write a song about the Green Bay Packers.”

Carol: “And he wants to make sure everyone is ready for game day.”

Me: “You have me convinced.”

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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