Me: “Here, smell my arm. I bought a new body lotion.”

Jon casually sniffs my elbow and then pretends to gag. Dramatically.

Me: “What, you don’t like it?”

Jon: “It smells like hot garbage in Brooklyn.”

Me: “You’re an asshole.”

Jon: “You’re in love with an asshole.”

Me: “Apparently you’re in love with hot garbage in Brooklyn.”