Playful, elegant, and not above the judicious use of the word “shit."

Black Out Mascara

For a countless number of years I used Avon brand mascara because my mother could get it for a huge discount. But when she retired last year and I ran out, I had to find a new brand. I never knew that mascara shopping could be so tricky and have spent the last eight months trying and discarding ones I’ve picked up at the drugstore. They’re all either too clumpy or too dry, some don’t apply well, and most just left me wanting to have eyelash extensions permanently attached to my lids so that I wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore. But then I visited the Sephora across the street from my hotel in New York and found this product by Dior, and now I’m going to petition the government to make it legal for a woman to marry her black mascara.

It’s all I ever wanted: lush, thick, and it applies like smooth butter. I actually look forward to putting this on my eyes, and it’s now my favorite part of cleaning myself up. Sorry, Mom. My heart moved on.

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