Best way to roast the broomstick. Must try. Five Stars.

My old man

Today is my dad’s 68th birthday. I can remember driving over to his house in my 1979 Datsun 510 back in Memphis and hammering a sign into his yard that said, “Happy 50th Dad!” That was EIGHTEEN YEARS AGO. Whooo-ahhhh? I called to wish him a happy birthday, and get this! My dad finally got call-waiting! FINALLY. IN 2009! Because he was talking to my sister on the other line! I COULDN’T BELIEVE IT. Next thing you know he’s going to start using his dishwasher! Dude is getting CRAZY in his old age!

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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