the smell of my desperation has become a stench

After waking up to eight inches of snow on the ground

Jon: This had better be the last storm of the season, so help me God.

Me: Did you really just say that out loud? Way to tempt the Universe, JON.

Jon: Heather, it’s all about creating the outcome we want by putting the right energy out there. You watch Oprah. You know this. That’s what I’m doing.

Me: Actually, Oprah says it’s better not to jinx things.

Jon: Give me a break, she has never said anything like that.

Me: It was that one show where these wives came on and talked about how all these stupid things kept happening in their lives because their husbands were all, “This better be the last time!” I remember it vividly.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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