Not a boring resolutions post, is it?

I’m not normally a resolution maker, but I think as I age I can see the wisdom in such an exercise. Know what else I’ve learned with age? Life is too short to a) wait until you’re alone to pull your underwear out of your butt, b) obey the sign that says, NO RIGHT TURN ON RED and c) listen to anyone who suggests that watching two hours of botfly infestation videos on YouTube is a waste of time.

Also, if someone sends me a link to a really good video of earwax removal, I’m like THERE GOES THE REST OF MY DAY.

So I’ve been thinking about what I want for me and my family in the upcoming year, and here’s what I’ve come up with. Note: I’m trying to be realistic, so I avoided anything involving Zac Efron, but hey! Did you guys hear? He and Vanessa broke up! That’s just awful and tragic, but such good news for those of you who aren’t married and have the balls to stalk him!

First, I want to cook more. Oh god, Jon’s mom is going to read that and start calling every day to make sure I haven’t burned down the house. Not going to happen! You know why? Because Tyrant heard I was going to help my mom cook the turkey for Thanksgiving and he immediately bought a fire extinguisher.

Next, I’d like to read more books. I could tell you the specific number of books I have in mind for the year, but then you would know how little I’m reading now, and that may be the one thing in my life I’m too embarrassed to share. It’s just… all those episodes of “America’s Next Top Model” aren’t going to watch themselves, and next thing you know the free time that I would have used to read a book is gone!

And finally (yes, there are only three things on this list, otherwise I’d be too overwhelmed, and next thing you know it’s a Tyra smorgasbord all over again), and this one is going to sound weird, but I want to mix up my wardrobe a little bit. Take more risks. Not like bikini-top-basketball-shorts-Jesus-sandals kind of risk, I’d just like to wear a wider variety of what I already own and not just the same comfortable t-shirt over and over again. Or have my friend Cami text me at eight o’clock at night asking, “Are you still in your workout clothes from this morning?” and have the answer be, “Yes, how did you know?”

Spill it. What are you aiming for this year? (if the answer is “moose” or “elk” I don’t want to know)