What idiot thought this was a good idea?

Marlo saw skates on one of the characters in a show she watches and has been asking me to get her skates for weeks. I guess I’ve been standing a little too close to the microwave all these years because my brain melted and I bought this kid skates. WTF? Seriously? Heather (yes, I’m referring to myself in the third person all Kanye-like), don’t take this the wrong way, but you be cray.