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Armstrongs are American, too

So the world is just a piece of crap and this war continues to make no sense and families are being destroyed as Dan Rather sits smugly from the safety of his make-up chair. The fucking dog across the street will not stop barking, and I really can’t blame him because I’d bark all day [...]

How to Annoy Me

Smell my dog’s feet and then gag loudly. What the hell did you expect, mother?

How to Charm Me

Suggest that the reason one of the men on “Married by America” is so grumpy is because “he isn’t getting any in the pooper.”

Feeling Guilty

For using the words “dry-hump” in association with Granny.

Thinking

With a wireless internet connection you don’t ever have to leave the bed. Now, how do we get the dog a wireless bladder?

Reading

The Morning After “Shock and Awe”

Listening

Calexico: Feast of Wire

Enjoying

Chmork.net