Posted in Daily Photo
S – poor fortune. =( Any company who lays someone off right before the holidays is clearly helmed by heartless asshats who don’t deserve your help anyway. Best of luck to you.
The reason the animals are all bug-eyed is that Baby Jesus is softly singing to himself: “And You…You liiiiight. Up. Myyyyyy. Liiiiife.”
All I want for chrismas is a GEORGE! and a house fit for a queen OF FRANCE!
Why doesn’t George have his very own web page?
I don’t just want him to have his own catagory, I want a whole web page.
I want, I want, I want…damn, i’m in the Christmas mood already.
Forgive me Sweet Baby Jesus!
Oh yes Carol, already hit the vodka gimlets and menthol cigarettes. JESUS! Oh wait, that’s what today’s picture is of! Look how neatly I just segued that all together. THEY DON’T DESERVE ME. BAH HUMBUG
I like how George can mention tainting his mouth with a tinge of vomit, and the ladies STILL desire to smooch him.
Ah, the lovely George. We heart you George. If I knew any decent single gals I’d send em your way. Most of the girls around here are married or nappyho’s.
Niffer- right on. If you don’t like what you see here feel free to move along. Despite what many of us think, Dooce does not exist to keep us entertained. She and her family are actual people with real feelings.
Don’t be an asshole.
I really want to know where that nativity came from!!!
“Baby Jesus will cut you when he gets back!” Oh. My. God. I’m glad it’s almost time to go home because I don’t think I can work anymore today. Thanks, Mrs. George #2 for a rare out loud laugh at work!
*Extreme- circa 1992*
only it’s “get the fuck out” instead of “feel free to move along”.
I’ve never seen a cow or sheep sit like that before, although I have a horse that will take a bow . . . but this has a mouse as big as a baby, and a chicken that’s bigger than both of them! Wow!
exactly, amanda. “GET THE FUCK OUT”. “FEEL FREE TO MOVE ALONG” would’ve been “Gee, look for another job, you have 2 weeks” Small thanks they gave 6 months severance and benefits…
Georgie, don’t swallow that puke! Open up and share the inner George with the rest of us.
Wait wait –
I’ve got a fever, and the only prescription is more GEORGE!
And less freaky baby jesus whatnot.
What the girls want now,
is George, more George.
He’s the only one
That can make them disgorge…
(OK, so there’s not much that rhymes with “George.”)
“Of Mice and Men” isn’t generally read when you are seven years old, and it doesn’t have that memorable voice! Although I’ll admit I’ve never read it. What? I’m not much for the classics. If you are forced to read it in school, it probably means that it’s not something you’d want to read on your own time. See: Charles Dickens (IMO, please don’t flame me). I am still a voracious reader, just not so much of the classics. And not just blogs, either.
I think maybe the buzzard was from Tiny Toon Adventures, and possibly a take-off from the “classic” abdominal snowman/bugs bunny cartoon. Scary when cartoons become postmodern, n’est pas? I can imagine both the snowman and the buzzard saying that line, so maybe both? Or maybe brain rot. You know, either way.
Oh, and before I forget again:
My MIL just gave my 2 year old daughter the Fisher-Price Little People Nativity set, “so she can learn about Baby Jesus.” This coming from a woman who doesn’t attend church herself. Whatever. My daughter likes playing with it.
Tell George! if he decides to head to South Carolina I’ve got an adorable 2 year old who would love to sit in his lap on the floor.
how about an adorable 32 year old on his lap?
Oh god, I didn’t just say that!
I know you like whatnot, you like it on top
Tell me, mammadooce, are you gonna stop?
You had me down, 21 to zip
Smile of Judas on your lip
Shake my pig, knock on wood
I’ve got it George, and I’ve got it good
Doctor, doctor, gimme the news
I got a bad case of lovin’ George
No pill’s gonna cure my ill
I got a bad case of bein engorged
Kelly H –
That reminds me of something i read about a toddler getting the Little People Noah’s Ark and the family ended up calling it the “gay pride boat” because it comes with a little rainbow flag on top. Well, we got one too and now call it the same thing.
Don’t you love subverting the in-laws intentions? *evil laugh*
Not sure if this has been said already, but it can bear repitition. I swear Baby Jesus looks like a piglet. Oink oink.
Okay, Chloe. I’m a spelling and reading dorkapotamus, so I’ve got to jump on you just a little bit.
It’s the *abominable* snowman, not the *abdominal* “abs of steel” snowman.
And: Dickens is great! And not “great” as in *important* yet *boring*. Actually great! And Thackeray is great too! And Austen! And Steinbeck! They’re entertaining as hell, especially for someone who’s already a voracious reader.
Okay. I’ll put away the soapbox and climb off the high horse now.
P.S. Starting a new trend – I am going for the last post here.
Remember that Queensryche hit?
Relax child, you were there
But only didn’t realize it and you were scared
It’s a place where you will learn
To face your fears, retrace the years
And ride the farm animals in your mind
Ceramics from another world
Suddenly you hear and smell
This magic new distension
George will be watching over you
George is gonna help you see it through
George will protect you in the night
George is puking next to you…
in the Violent Nativity
so I have trouble with the bold thing. I’m a dorkapotamus, not a technosaur.
Contrary to all you negatives… I think its cute, who doesn’t love ceramic baby jesus… and farm animals for that matter?
Another favorite subversive? The holiday that the IL’s gave Mimi Smartypants’ daughter a Noah’s Ark and she explained to her daughter that it was a “Darwin Boat”. As in “Look, honey! A Darwin boat! Let’s play with it.”
Motherhood, George, the f-word, house renovation, antidepressants…yes, it’s all good.
how come, when the comments get into the hundreds people just start writing poems and sonets, and for the love of jesus just write a comment!!
I’ve been last post before!
Love in Christ,
OMFG! Talk about synchronicity. (The Jungian kind, not The Police kind).
I just hopped over onto a forum where I get my home renovation questions answered and WTF?
Looks like the mouse has it on the authority of the fuzzy bunny that the chicken is a ho.
What is that thing on the left doing with its butt in the air like a cat in heat?
That is just wrong.
Thanks, jm, now we know where easter eggs come from!
I swear I have gotten the best abs workout today just by lol at some of the posts. The first was the crack pipe one, then many others. Then I started calling in my colleagues to look at the photo and we were all laughing out loud. It’s a big academic aerobic fest in here today. Thanks, Dooce!
PS: Not only did I get a workout and home renovation tips, but I got to share the Lenny-Abominable Snowman link with a student who’s writing on Steinbeck. Total ‘synchronicity’–you said it!
My cow has begun to sit in the Lotus position and meditate for hours and days. Perhaps it is because she is aware the king of kings has just been born and the brat is a beef-eater?
So sorry, but I forgot to say this earlier: Fuck.
Heather, don’t they know that YOU ARE OUR PROPHET AND YOU SPEAK OUR FUCKING LANGUAGE? Isn’t there a verse about Paul being “all things to all men”? You’re doing that for US.
Abdominal snowman!!! Hilarious!
“POP” that’s my bottle of wine. But not here, dear Dooce readers. I’ll spare you that tonight.
It’s girls night!! AAAHHHHHHHRRRRRGGGG!
So have fun. I’ll miss you guys.
But before I go… Amanda B. and Aaron… What are y’all talking about?
*barney…wiggles…. um…led zepplin*
I want to play, too, but I don’t get it.
The cow has a hunchback, and that horse looks like it’s getting ready to reconvene the procedure.
chocolate peppermint christmas cookies
incomprehensible, that’s what you are …incomprehensible, though near or far
Like a song of love that clings to me… How the thought of you does things to me
Never before has someone been more… incomprehensible, in every way
And for evermore, that’s how you’ll stay…That’s why darling, it’s incredible
That someone so incomprehensible…Thinks that I am incomprehensible too
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