There is no such thing as a right to wear clogs. There is, however, plenty reason to want to beat those who wear them over the head with some common sense.
Posted in Nubbin | Tagged Jon
Superior cleaning power
In order to leave a comment, you must take sides
Featured community question wherein Jon makes his mother proud
Now, I’m not totally anti-clog…I used to work food-service and believe in the lifesaving power of Dansko…but man clogs? outside the kitchen? no, darling.
And what’s more? The Manolo has your back, Dooce:
Ahem…”he” being my own boyfriend Just thought I should clear that up.
The best part of this is that all the ads coming up on this site are in favor of clogs. For once, I’m on the side of the big corporations!
You know, I’m a Birkenstock-wearin’ girl, but I kind of hate these things.
Hang in there… those things are EVIL. And I do mean EEEEEEEEVIL.
I’m with you! We must stop them before my husband buys a pair!
RIGHT ON DINIS!
Sadly I do agree with Laura McMasters…but before I sell my soul to the clog Gods, we need to remember that ‘straight’ men don’t know any better! It’s our duty as wives and the women that love them to keep them from continuing their fashion mistakes!
My husband seems to think its okay to wear socks with his Addis flip-flops. He knows better than try and leave the house with me dressed that way, but if wants to wear them around the yard or house I could care less.
Married women will all agree….Your husbands appearance reflects on you. Sad, but true.
He must be stopped, I agree. Its very impractical footware…and just plain…wrong…Where do I sign up in the Dooce Anti-Clog Campagin??
darnit heather, return the man his clogs already. HE GAVE YOU CHILD. isn’t that reason enough?
Coming soon to a mailbox near you:
One pair of size 13 Black Crocs.
What size do YOU wear Heather?
Yes, they are ugly. I even called them “those stupid ugly shoes” when I was scouring the city for baby blue ones for my daughter. Then I was very nearly physically forced to try them on, at Payless, by a managerial type guy. So, Heather and all you other croc haters, don’t knock it till you try it!
Of course, my Born clogs are pretty comfy too…just no good when it’s raining.
Just be glad you don’t live in the Denver/Boulder area and are accosted by Crocs every day.
Why do you even care what shoes your husband wears? It annoys me to think that the same people who agree with you on this clog jihad would also scream bloody murder if the tables were turned, and Jon was the one telling you what you weren’t allowed to wear.
Down with Crocs!
My mother and father both think they are heaven-sent, but I told my mom that if she ever bought me any, I would drop out of college and take up permanent residence in the guest room.
My grandmother came to stay with us a few weeks ago and on one of our out-of-town shopping adventures we saw a whole Croc-wearing family. The little boy was wearing PURPLE Crocs. Even my grandma cringed and said “Well, he’ll turn out gay.”
Ok, I just gotta say. I made fun of those for a long time. Then I put some on my preggo swelling feet. They are just too damn comfy. My hubby is also Dutch, the home of clogs. I gotta go with Jon on this one! lol!
I completely agree & support your decision. No real man should ever want to wear those things, or even utter the word “clog.” It’s not in our vocabulary. For the good of your family, make him see the light.
from Will & Grace:
Will: They’re clogs. They’re good for your back.
Grace: They’re good for the back of your closet.
Come out of your house holding the clogs. Place them on the ground, and back away from the clogs. If you do this, no one will be hurt.
Um, your husband has linked to a picture from People.com on his site, saying that even famous people (although it seems pretty limited) wear clogs.
It appears that they also wear aqua cargo capris with their clogs.
You can tell Jon that the famous people thing just ain’t gonna work if that’s all he’s got. =)
Seriouly Heather, give the man back his shoes!
Vive La Clogs!
VIVA LA CLOGS!!!
Just give in Heather..just give in there are too many of us, surrender now and no one will be hurt!
Honestly just put them on your feet and your life will be changed.
Just practice telling him what you are going to have to tell Leta time and time again the older she gets; “It’s for your own good.” Because really, in the end clearly, “he doesn’t know any better.”
Are we anti-clogs in all circumstances? I mean… what about ER doctors and nurses? Or… doing the laundry or something?
I’m just saying… it’s not all black and white here.
My vote is in!
Anti-clogs – the war on clogs should be fought much more vehemently than the war on terrorism, IMHO.
Mainly because you don’t see ordinary Americans standing on the backs of terrorists trying to pass off as people deserving of anything less than a kick in the neck.
Tell John to take the advice of the gay community, as we have better fashion sense and taste.
DO NOT WEAR THE CLOGS!
Men should not wear clogs. END OF STORY.
Why is it that comfortable and stylish always seem to be mutually exclusive when it come to clothes, shoes, etc.?
I’m with you Heather- ban the clogs! Think of the children! Won’t somebody please think of the Children?!?!
I know they’re completely hideous, but Crocs do feel pretty fantastic on my 8-month pregnant feet.
Sick, but true.
I have one thing to say to you. At least they are not bright orange like the one my hubby loves.
OK, so clogs aren’t exactly sexy-looking. But DAMN, they are comfortable. My husband and I both wear them. They’re especially good for people with wide or otherwise weirdly shaped feet (don’t know if Jon qualifies there). And for a man who works at home and therefore doesn’t need wingtips to go with his power tie, what the hell? You could be worse off — having to look at him wearing old-man mall-walkers: http://www.zappos.com/n/p/dp/3244450/c/650.html
Awww, he’s so lucky he has someone in his life who loves him enough to take away the clogs.
And #104-Kate, I totally disagree. Whenever I see crocs, I immediately think crunchy, granola, hippy hipster.
Followed quickly by a little whisper that chants: “kill! kill! kill!”
I bet those things look really cute on Jon.
Give them back!
Keep up the fight! CROCS are only cute (if you can call it that) on little girls. I am curious what kind of outfit Cindy’s husband wears the above clogs with??? They look kind of like dress up clogs.
I love my pink crocs! Granted my 7yo son would absolutely love you and even tried to hide my pair before I got them out of the store! I think if you wore them you’d love them too! ;
While I am rabid anti-male-clog contingent, I’d vote for an inside-only clog clause.
Crocs are evil. You should buy Jon some Chacos to replace the Crocs. They are the best sandals ever. Maybe the Zongs? Unless he has ugly toes. Then Chacos are out.
I have to take sides against the clogs. Maybe if they were leather or canvas… but plastic shoes make me think of stinky feet, even if they are ventilated. P-U!
Representin’ the Pro-Croc Coalition here…. Give me your tired feet, your toes, yearning to be clogged…. the revolution is rising…. we shall overcome the haters….. and wear comfortable, oddly-shaped footwear…..at least just in the garden…..
-.-. .-.. — –. … .-. ..- .-.. .
(that’s Morse code for “CLOGS RULE” and will be our drumbeat. Yes, it took me five minutes to toggle back and forth to do that. I AM COMMITTED TO THE CAUSE.)
Crocs are this generations jellies (remember those horrid things in the 80s). Then, as now, only small children can get away with plastic shoes. No exceptions. There are other comfortable shoes. Even without the plastic thing, the colors (oh, my eyes!) the holes (even if the people’s feet aren’t stinky, I see those holes in otherwised closed toe shoes and I start checking the direction of the wind so I can stand upwind), and general ugliness, my personal rule is that shoes should not be bought at card stores…and Hallmark is the number one location I see for Crocs sales.
THERE ARE OTHER COMFORTABLE SHOES, PEOPLE!
And as for clogs in general, while I have only limited appreciation for clogs for myself (only leather, only in fall/winter, and only with really interesting tights and a cute skirt), I can mostly ignore them on others, and certainly would never say anything about them. Unless they make that clopping sound. Clogs that clomp are just flat out noise pollution. Ugh. Selfish, selfish, those clomping clog wearers are selfish. And if that’s the sort of clogs being held hostage, I say Heather’s treating them too well. They should be burned, baby, burned!
now i get it. heather doesn’t approve of jon’s *clogs* because it reminds her of her chronic inability to poop.
stealing the clogs is a symbolic psychosocial attempt to seize power over the agony of constipation.
let the man have the CROCS, heather!! their comfy, their light, their fashionable! just take a zanex, pour a glass of bourbon, and deal with it. and go buy yourself and leta a nice pair of 9 wests or something to ease the pain.
THANK GOD – someone else who thinks that no good can come of bare feet and rubber shoes. Ick. And they are UGLY people.
I’m completely with you, Heather. Those plastic clogs are hideous.
attention hater-aid drinkers:
1) crocs and any off-brand form they take are comfortable
2) wearing crocs is like walking on marshmallows (sans goo)
3) they come in a rainbow of colors
4) no animals die
5) no association with hippies
6) crocs: always dry
let it go, haters!
People, people, people. If you don’t know what you’re talking about, don’t talk. These are NOT plastic shoes. They are nothing like the sweaty jellies of the 80′s.
Long live Crocs!
You go girl.
If us woman didn’t correct these kinds of “offenses against society” men would continue to walk the earth in… clogs… shorts with white socks pulled up to mid-calf… wife-beaters.
Thank you for doing your part for humanity.
They need to be outlawed. I don’t care how comfortable they might be – ridculousness outweighs comfort!
Stand firm, H! Crocs are weapons of mass infugtion. No one should wear rubber shoes. No one.
Whoever invented these horrendous shoes needs to be shot. WHAT IS THE REASON FOR THE HOLES IN THESE THINGS? The only people that should be allowed to wear clogs are little Dutch boys with bowl haircuts and chefs. Because apparently clogs – sans the holes in the top – are much safer and sturdier for chefs than sneakers or other sorts of work shoes. But if you don’t speak German and if you aren’t making flan or foie gras, you have no right wearing clogs. Period. End of story.
Fight the good fight, Heather!
Copyright © 2013 Armstrong Media, LLC. All rights reserved.
Advertise on dooce®