These are my sister’s five kids, clockwise from the left: Mariah, 17, Britton, 11, Meredith, 15, This One, 8, That One, 8. Mariah is the oldest grandchild on my side of the family, and I remember calling my mom from a pay phone in downtown Chattanooga, Tennessee in 1991 to ask if my sister had [...]
I was going to make a comment about Valentine’s Day and how we forgot to get each other anything, but I got too distracted by the tiny dog leg growing out of Chuck’s head. Like he absorbed a twin, and now it’s trying to escape his brain.
You may have noticed that last week we launched a modified design to this website, and I didn’t want to say anything about it for a few days because I just couldn’t get enough of the disgruntled email. I sort of inadvertently conducted a little social experiment, one where the longer I remained silent about [...]
I found this trench coat in the maternity section at Target, and although it’s pretty thin and doesn’t provide a lot of warmth, it’s big enough to fit around my growing belly and dressy enough to wear for several upcoming engagements including my book tour. I’ve already reached that point in my pregnancy where I’m [...]
My mother, The Avon World Sales Leader, is conducting a special choir for the upcoming dedication of this recently completed Mormon temple in Draper, Utah. The general public is encouraged to come and tour the temple before its dedication, meaning unrepentant heathens like me and Jon have permission to take a look around, and since [...]
I love how the dogs can treat each other this way but know that if they ever tried this with me or Jon they’d be boiled, processed, and then ground into fertilizer. I’m guessing that this exact scene will happen one day between Leta and her little sister, and when it does I’ll let them [...]
“Are you going to write about how you had to call me to come to your rescue because you drove the car into a pole?” “I didn’t technically drive it ‘into’ a pole. I’d prefer to call it ‘scraping.’ I scraped a pole.” “Doesn’t matter. I just find it funny that the nagger in this [...]
It’s been snowing for three days straight, and combined with all the other snow that’s already on the ground and the constant overcast sky, it makes for a somewhat gray, dirty, and solemn backdrop to life. I could use a palm tree right about now.
About a year ago when we took a “vacation” to San Diego (I use the term “vacation” here interchangeably with “nightmare”), I picked up a bottle of lemongrass and lavender body lotion at the Loews Coronado Bay Resort that was the best smelling body lotion I have ever used. Problem is you can’t get that [...]
My friend Sarah turns He’s Just Not That Into You into a drinking game and hits upon this fantastic insight into what it means to be American: There was this one great scene, though, when Jennifer Aniston had to walk a dog down the aisle in a coral satin bridesmaid dress, smirking and hurting, head [...]