Last week a member of our extended family died. It was devastating and not something I was going to write about because this person was on Jon’s side of the family, and I usually like to exclude them from my commentary here. But in light of what has gone on over the past three days [...]
It’s completely exhausting having to keep track of all the shoes in this house.
Or, I guess, more accurately, The Upper East Side. At dusk. Was it worth seeing this to have flown all the way to New York on Mother’s Day only to have CBS cancel our segment for no reason last night? Not sure. Am I going to write about this? You bet. Gotta catch a plane [...]
Yesterday we heard Marlo mumbling, “Coco,” repeatedly as she shoved a wedge of graham cracker into her mouth. And then again as she crawled intricate mazes throughout the living room. That’s all she said yesterday, and we realized she may think it’s the only word in the world because all she hears every day is [...]
Sadly, Chuck is not allowed to come with us on our vacation to Florida next month (if there is one, PLEASE OIL SPILL STAY AWAY, that’s my ridiculous first world whining for today). So we’re just reenacting what it would be like if he were there. And yes, I made sure to lather him with [...]
I want to show this to my mom and go, this? This is animal decor. And then I’ll wave my middle finger at the giant ceramic rooster sitting next to her refrigerator. Tortoises. For real. Courtesy of Jason Sweeney. See all his illustrations here. Pro tip: you should be following this man on Twitter (@sween). [...]
Last night as I was changing Marlo into her pajamas I found a half-chewed piece of graham cracker, a swath of dried applesauce and two Cheerios tucked right inside the lip of her diaper. And no, I certainly did not experience an inexplicable urge to shove the crumbs into my mouth to avoid having to [...]
That boot would have remained right there all day were it not for some grabby, chubby fingers. Chuck is so happy that Marlo is around.
You guys, I do not do anything to this kid’s eyes in these photos. That is the real color. My dad said that next time I post a photo of him on my website he wants me to Photoshop her eyes onto his. And give him hair.
Me: I thought you understood going into this that we’re a glass half empty kind of family. Jon. No, no, no, no, no. Me: Why are you shaking your head like that? Jon: Because I did think you guys were glass half empty people, when in reality all of you are THE GLASS IS TOTALLY [...]