• Suebob

    You don’t need a bony butt to be miserable on a horse. I rode a mule at my heaviest and had to do the childbirth breathing too, and I wasn’t even trained in it.

  • Kristi K.


  • Becky

    Thanks for all the laughs….:-)
    Joseph lives in Vegas right? ;)

  • Heather Armstrong

    Joseph IS Vegas.

  • Tom

    Hello, new boyfriend, nice to meet you!

  • TheAndreaK

    Pro tip for riding horses: take two ibuprofen and one aleve BEFORE you even get on the horse. I don’t like to load up on unnecessary medications/chemicals but it saves you a ton of pain while on the horse and after.

  • Ann Snyder Rishell

    Great and hilarious! Love the car!

  • Heidi

    Awesome! Looks like a really fun weekend! What a hoot! Also, delighted to see a blog-introduction to Mr. Ray-Ban.

  • Sue

    This post screams HAPPY. Like, Heather is happy. HAPPY is hard won. Glad you’re feeling it.

  • Liesel

    Oh you are such a jerk. I recognized some pics from his IG feed and thought for sure you’d address it. Damn you.

  • Casey

    I think this is one of my favorite Dooce posts of all times. I love what you’re doing and how you’re doing it. Mommyblogging rules. Good work.

  • Nicole Morgan

    Last trip to Carmel was to ride horses up mountains, like huge mountains compared to the flatness which is FL, because really … landfills don’t count. But the pain, and my butt is not even bony. Pinot Noir was more effective than Aleve.

  • Heather Armstrong

    Thank you for this. I really appreciate it. I try my hardest to make everything work, and I’m so glad you like it.

  • Heather Armstrong

    They offer a half-day tour and I was like, wouldn’t that be a Gilligan’s Island kind of thing where no one comes back alive? How… I mean… I may need hypnosis to stop the pain in my thighs.

  • Tracy

    catan!! I LOVE catan!!!

  • Jared

    Story for another time?!?!?!?!? How about a story for RIGHT NOW!!! I’m entitled to know everything when I want to know it. I kid. I kid. Great post and you looked wonderful in that dress.

  • Heather Armstrong

    Yes, Catan! I love it now!

  • Heather Armstrong

    Thank you. I’m not used to wearing dresses, so I was worried a bit.

  • http://www.absentmindedhousewife.com/ The Absent Minded Housewife

    Okay…just what does the mascara man do to get legs like that?

  • Former fan

    I find it tiresome how you treat Tyrant as a minstrel. Gay people are not toys to point at and laugh about.

  • Ruthie

    LOVE this post. Happiness looks good on you.

  • Guest

    Oh please… grow some humor sense.

  • Natasha

    you looked gorgeous in the dress! love your blog (even if I’m a silent creeper)

  • Mrs. Kennedy

    That man has the most incredible calves I’ve ever seen.

  • arrigato

    The best description of horseback riding came from my daughter’s friend after an hour-long ride in Bariloche, Argentina. As she limped toward the stable she said, “I feel like I have been having sex for 8 hours. With a Sumo wrestler.”

  • Jennifer Cafferty

    What a great post – the smile looks great on you! I just have no words for that car, or that shirt….too funny! And you are dangling the carrot, you know we are all biting, let’s hear it! :)

  • Lynn Bossange

    Great post. I love how you bring in the sponsors and that they don’t seem to care (yet) about how, exactly, you really do bring them in. Looks like you had so much fun. Can I go on the next trip? I’ll wrangle the horses…

  • Heather Armstrong

    When I share this comment with him he will be so proud.

  • Elizabeth

    You are dating Tim Roth? Holy Bananas!! ;)

  • Heather Armstrong

    I’m sorry, but Tyrant cannot sing.

  • Jamie

    So… was Dane’s mom like 13 when she gave birth?!?! She looks amazing! I love that we’ve been seeing smiles on your face more often, too <3 Also – I was smiling at the overall outfit as I was scrolling down then *BAM* they were shorts too – that made me giggle. Glad you had a good time and I love that Dane totally embarrassed his brother picking him up. He gets bonus points.

  • Nicole B.

    My friends play games like these too. I always just want to play Uno and get buzzed but, noooo we have to play some new game one of my nerdy friends picked up.

    Dress is super cute btw!

  • Cindy O

    We LOVE Settlers of Catan. Wait until you get the expansion pack and add Cities and Knights. Total game-changer.

  • Kathleen

    HEATHER! I know all about boys who like to play games more than be employed, or like, leave the house.
    BUT HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE A GAME WHERE YOU GET TO SAY “Do you have wood for sheep?”

  • Ari

    Thank you, that was my EXACT thought. Also, this post rules, Heather. Well done, you.

  • Heather Armstrong

    Hahahaha! STAR. FOLLOW. LIKE.

  • Heather Armstrong

    We actually had a guessing game about her age that night because she looks more like his sister than his mother. None of us were even close. She is even more stunning in person.

  • greeblemonkey

    We have a dude ranch here in Colorado that we have been lucky enough to visit many times and it is magical. Great pics, as always. And I literally snorted at “can you find the gay man?”

  • Ehms.

    Forget the calves, those are some meticulously groomed eyebrows. Michael K at Dlisted would have a fit!

  • Stacey

    I love stories with cliffhangers! And cute ones too.

  • KristenfromMA

    Point at and laugh about? How about worshiped and admired? (Man is some damn fine eye candy!)

  • Robin Cole

    Thank you so much for sharing this weekend with us. I moved from SLC to Germany about a year ago, and I love checking your blog both for your stories/life and your amazing Utah pictures.

  • Sarah C.

    Love the story. Love the dress. Love how happy everyone looks. Love that cute boy at the end. This type of sponsored post just makes complete sense. And, yes, that man’s calves are to be COMMENDED. Good genetics, sure, but also some serious effort.

  • Kate S.

    One of my favorite posts ever. Lately your posts have seemed so vibrant and extra funny in a very natural way. Something huge seems authentically better (‘better’ as in like when you ‘get better’ after being sick, not ‘better’ like you sucked as a human before) about you now. I’m really happy for you.

  • Carmen Cheevers

    This is a sponsored post I can totally get behind. I literally was crying laughing at my desk. Also, I totally do horse sound effects and I OWN a horse.

  • Anastasiya

    I was getting pissed off thinking you won’t mention a certain someone who is making you smile lately…. and then BAM!

  • jessicafromsf


  • specialkrispy

    You have really beautiful people in your life. And OMG was RYAN GOSLING on your team??

  • Sue

    What Casey said. You strike the balance perfectly.

  • http://kristanhoffman.com/ Kristan

    Oh you are such a tease. :P