Our guest room redecorated for under $300, with the kind assistance of Super Target and my mom. Too bad it’s only going to look like this for 7 more months.
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Heater, Mother of Lance
Heather B. Armstrong
Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.
m.d.
2003/06/10 at 2:28 pmcongratulations!
eyemkent
2003/06/10 at 2:29 pmMany congratulations! On the nicely-done room, sure-sure… but for a reason to change it all again in seven months – Yay! 😀
nick
2003/06/10 at 2:29 pmNice job! I’m stuck painting the inside of the house, and we’ve already blown far more than $300 on “Ice Blue” latex paint from the Home Depot.
Spanky
2003/06/10 at 2:29 pmCongrads 😉
vilde
2003/06/10 at 2:30 pmMy first comment, and what a nice one, too: Congratulations!!
Bast
2003/06/10 at 2:32 pmEeek!!! Your pregnant!! Yea!! Oh my god! I can’t wait! I’m so excited for you!
(I hope it’s a girl)
aubs
2003/06/10 at 2:32 pmHOW FANTASTIC!!!!
See, it wasn’t bloating afterall! (per your ‘How to Charm Me.’) What a very lucky baby he/she will be…
Peggasus
2003/06/10 at 2:34 pmThat’s great! I’m so happy for you & the Husband!
Keep the rocking chair. Trust me on this one.
Cover letters
2003/06/10 at 2:36 pmCongrats!
Michele
2003/06/10 at 2:36 pmCongrats!!!!! Babies are gifts from god, you’re whole life is going to change for the better. It will be bumpy but the destination is heaven.
ericalynn
2003/06/10 at 2:37 pmthat absolutely rocks. congratulations 🙂
Erika
2003/06/10 at 2:39 pmcongratulations! A mini Dooce…Oh.my.god. all the poop!
antisocialdiva
2003/06/10 at 2:40 pmoh my god! yay! i know how much you’ve been wanting this! congratulations, heather! *big kisses*
get back to work Jim
2003/06/10 at 2:40 pmHere is the scariest thing about having children
TELLE-FUCKING-TUBBIES
Congrats Dooce!
lizpenn
2003/06/10 at 2:41 pmgood grief. i can’t believe we all get to follow a dooce pregnancy online. i will be checking in obsessively. mazel tov!
Buzz
2003/06/10 at 2:41 pmCongratulations! That’s wonderful! And the room looks fan-tiddly-tastic!
lee
2003/06/10 at 2:54 pmHoly shit. That is so kick ass. Congrats, babe.
Lara
2003/06/10 at 3:01 pmI KNEW IT!!!!
Congrats grrl!!! AWESOME!
pd
2003/06/10 at 3:14 pmI can’t wait for the baby bootie photo montage.
Congratulations, Dooce!
Katy
2003/06/10 at 3:21 pmwoo-hoo for reproduction! congratulations, dooce!
get back to work Jim
2003/06/10 at 3:24 pmI just love the Utah Baby Namer
If it is a girl – Chatruce Dooce
If it is a boy – Zeus Dooce
Jen
2003/06/10 at 3:25 pmGreat way to sneak that in there. Congratulations. I think that’s kind of an odd thing to say when you’re having a baby, but everyone else said it so it must be right, somehow.
Sara, Brad and George
2003/06/10 at 3:26 pmHeather, Did you see the big plane that flew into the apartment building on Spaulding and Rosewood!! ?? Only one block closer and it would have gone right into Leroy! CRAZY! Did they show it on the news in Utah? Are you allowed news from other states???? let me know. kiss chuck for me!
Naaman
2003/06/10 at 3:28 pmOMG, Congratulations!!!
I’m picturing blonde, curly-haired babies with big, fuzzy beards.
Honey Bear
2003/06/10 at 3:29 pmHere is a tip from The Honey Bear: kids of all ages and sexes LOVE the Honey Bear. Buy your child a stuffed Honey Bear. It is kinder than buying a live Honey Bear like me, and cost less, too. But don’t be fooled by thoses bitches Teddy Ruxpin and Winnie the Pooh; they are not honey bears, but on the contrary, they are my enemies. I swear, if I see that fucker Winnie again and I’m gonna smash 40 ounces of Misery over his head. Congratulations on your impregnation and teach the little human child to hate Winnie the Pooh and Teddy Ruxpin and to love HONEY BEAR.
Anne
2003/06/10 at 3:32 pmBABY DOOCE!! How exciting. Hurrah!
the mighty jimbo
2003/06/10 at 3:33 pmman, are we ever gonna get blessed with gobs of poop stories.
chuck is gonna be so jealous.
~Angel
2003/06/10 at 3:34 pmI’ve never been happier for someone I don’t know!
Congratulations!
stacey
2003/06/10 at 3:41 pmThe handsome bearded virile Armstrong must be so pleased with his potent little wigglers. Best to the four of you (including Chuck, of course.)
the mighty jimbo (again)
2003/06/10 at 3:43 pmi assume you already have the book “everyone poops.”
well, everyone but you dooce. but regardless, if you do not, it would be my pleasure to send a copy to you as a baby gift and sincere thanks for all the countless hours of procrastination you have provided over the last year.
hell, if stories of your dog, utah, and constipation have been that much fun, i CAN”T WAIT for pregnancy and baby stories. talk about material!
Tiffany
2003/06/10 at 3:46 pmWelcome to the club, Heather.
primaprimate
2003/06/10 at 3:50 pmDaRhonda Dooce?
DarmaLu Dooce?
ahh… my fave D’Bessoudo Dooce. assuming it’s a grrrlll…
rather assuming of me!
Zoochie Dooce? That sounds frighteningly close to that song on Jay and Silent Bob… Jeddi Nephi Dooce? I’m having WAY too much fun. almost makes you wish you were mormon… well…
Congratulations and all the best. And beautiful room… but can’t wait to see it in 7 mos. Nor to hear about the fiascos that ensue when you redo it… stay away from paint cans stored in hi places!
leslie
2003/06/10 at 3:59 pmWow, dooce! I am so excited for you. The world needs more hip mamas… check out the Web site http://www.hipmama.com
Xanthan
2003/06/10 at 4:03 pmCongrats, Dooce. I predict that room will not last as a guest room for a whole seven months. Those nesting hormones will probably kick in sometime around September… I wish for you an easy and uneventful pregnancy.
Pat
2003/06/10 at 4:05 pmmay you have a trouble free pregnancy and a pain free birth ps love the room
Sara
2003/06/10 at 4:08 pmCongrats!! I am very happy for you. You’ll have a beautiful family!
Neil
2003/06/10 at 4:09 pmCongratulations! (and the guest room looks great, too)
Ariel
2003/06/10 at 4:10 pmI just loved that you made the annoucement to the world by showing something you peed uponst. CONGRATULATIONS!
christa
2003/06/10 at 4:17 pmAwesome! I have to agree with Angel and say that I have never been so happy for someone I didn’t know! Yay, babies!!
Los Feliz freak
2003/06/10 at 4:25 pmWhile I’m thrilled for you personally, Dooce, I mourn the thought of this site turning into a font of gurgling baby photos and baby poop stories. Please promise you’ll spare us that.
louisegyrl
2003/06/10 at 4:28 pmCONGRATS!!!!!
Sue
2003/06/10 at 4:38 pmCongratulations! I’ve been waiting for the blessed day! If only if we can read your humourous accounts of being up the duffer (aussie for being pregnant)
Kat
2003/06/10 at 4:49 pmeeek!
UnderwearNinja
2003/06/10 at 4:50 pmI’m *such* a tard. I was baffled as to why you posted a picture of a toothbrush. It wasn’t until comment no.38 that I figured it out. Congratulations.
I_is_here
2003/06/10 at 4:51 pmCongratulations! You go girl. Best wishes. You gonna be the coolest mom on the block.
I_is_here
2003/06/10 at 5:01 pmp.s. don’t pin the kid with some weird name though. And if it’s a boy, promise you won’t dress him up like Little Lord Fauntleroy in green velvet shorts and ruffled shirt. I had an aunt that did that to one of my cousins….poor kid.
Congrats!!
rosebaby
2003/06/10 at 5:04 pmit’s about time! hope her hair isn’t septic tank poopy red. i’m really thrilled for you.
Mervis
2003/06/10 at 5:05 pmMazal Tov!
natalie
2003/06/10 at 5:07 pma baby…how wonderful! congratulations! and nice going on the room, by the way…
Suzyn
2003/06/10 at 5:09 pmgood news on the baby. bad news for the budweiser.