An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Eat Your Heart Out, Trading Spaces

  • oh cool! does this mean there’ll be a baby dooce blog?! worth a try…

  • michele


  • lisa

    i have the SAME thing happening here!

  • Fox

    I wish you much luck and even more happiness!

  • pat

    when i read that dooce and a half blurb i sprayed my montior with a mouth full of hot coccoa i wish you all the best

  • tee

    congratulations dooce! all the best to you and the husband.

  • jodi no blog

    Congratulations!!! And to agree with Miz_A, I’m glad to hear about some smart people breeding. That damn gene pool seems to be getting more and more shallow every day…

  • The room looks gorgeous, but somehow I’m guessing you’re more excited about the item in the last picture. 😉

    Congratulations to you both! 🙂

  • dayna

    i knew it, i knew it, i had a feeling when you posted something about not drinking too much the other day….congrats!! i’ve just hit 6 and a half months, and it’s actually such a blast being all knocked up. 🙂

  • Boomer

    Congratulations! But…you’re gonna need a crib in there, not a double bed 😉

  • Cyn

    Congratulations. Your life will never be the same, but it is worth it! Take lots of pictures and videos! (From a mother who’s oldest baby just graduated from High School)

  • oh! babies! that’s lovely, congratulations dear 😀

  • finally, some smart people are reproducing.

  • Marvelous

    Thats Awesome CONGRATS DOOCE!!

  • if you think you’re constipated now…


  • Staci

    Congradulations!! I’m so happy for you. But I want you to know what happens when you reproduce. Here is a post from my husbands blog . . . . .

    *Rebekah sucks her thumb… a lot. It bothers the hell outta me. She also puts everything she touches into her mouth. This also bothers me a lot… especially when it’s my dvd cases. But, as I sat here yesterday, happily chewing on a rubber cap from a little plastic tube that the new router bits come in, I realized that she’ll never stop putting everything in her mouth.

    Brian leaves his socks laying on the floor every stinking day. Last night before he got in bed I went in his room and told him to pick up all the clothes and put them in the hamper. Immediately I spied 3 socks on the floor and knew, knew without a doubt, what was about to happen. He happily picked up every piece of clothing in his room… except for those 3 socks. Then I went in our room to get ready for bed and saw a pair of socks laying by my side of the bed. I know they’ve been there for at least 2 weeks.

    Chewing on every inanimate object that will possibly fit in your mouth, and leaving socks on the floor are hereditary. Who knew?! I’ve cursed my kids with annoying habits*

  • wow oh WOW! are you for hire??? 🙂

  • Wow. I am so ridiculously happy for you. You are going to be Supermom!

  • Angelique

    many congrats and best wishes. this is going to provide you and us with so much more to discuss…..

    best wishes on an easy pregnancy.

  • Aww yay! congrats! Babies are wonderful!

  • Zeek

    Yay!! Congratulations!

  • Laura


  • Laura


  • J

    I just got it! wow! sooo cool! congratulations to the 2 coolest would-be parents ever!

  • holy crap!

    congradulations! :O

  • Congrats to you and your hubby! Boy, are you gonna have fun now.

    Diaper genies don’t work. Just get the one that you can slide closed in addition to the lid (you’ll know what I’m talking about when you see it). Also, the babyseat and stroller combo things are awesome because you don’t wake the baby when you move it from the car to stroller to house.

    Oh, and since some hospitals mix babys up, when the baby pops out, hubby sticks like glue as they take him/her to measure, weigh, and swab off. He sticks until they put the baby name tag on.

    Finally, everyone’s gonna want to tell you all their horror stories, and every one they’ve ever heard, some of which are urban myths. STOP THEM. Tell them you’ve heard it already, and that you’re done with horror stories. This is because everything WILL be OK, and that bad stuff won’t happen to you, so you don’t need to hear it and then worry about it.

    (Yet one more: make sure the initials of the name you pick don’t spell something that s/he’ll pay for on the playground.)

  • too cool. congrats.

  • We should have known something was up with all the bologna and chocolate pudding cravings…(smile) That’s such wonderful news!!! Congratulations!

  • Sheila

    I just checked out the UBN; surprised to find Sheighlagh – comes pretty close to the Celtic spelling of my name (Sheilagh).

  • You aren’t going to let your nephews into that room are you? If so, I have a suggestion: Plastic Sheeting.

  • I am totally available for babysitting. I will drive from Oklahoma to Utah armed with nothing but Fruit Roll Ups and mix tapes and handi-wipes.

  • Congratulations! Wishing you a healthy pregnancy and delivery!

  • That is gonna be one tall kid. Congratulations!!!!

  • Congrats to the both of you! I’m sure there will be tons of new poop stories to come! 🙂

  • abi

    Congratulations! You’ll make great parents.

  • Congrats! Oh…no baby dooce! 🙂

  • anna jr.

    good job heather!
    and tell jon i said so too!

    it looks like i’m not the only one that’s happy for you – but i am really really happy for you.

    better write as much as possible while you can – in 7 months you’ll have other things to do!

  • Duff

    you may enjoy which is the pregnancy diary of

  • Erika


  • OMG! You’re pregnant! Ahh, that’s wonderful! This is such great news! Ahh, congratulations!!!!!! YAYAYAYAYAY! (Is it your husband’s baby?)

  • Congratualtions!

  • yay! congratulations!

  • Happy news! Congratulations!

    I just KNEW that the crying jags and cravings were leading up to something!

  • Congrats on the Blurbodoocelette! Do we have a due date?

  • Danika


  • just me

    Wow! I’m SOOO Happy for you!
    Chuck will have a partner in crime. 🙂

    Take good care!

    ~Melissa #200-something

  • essie

    I’m so happy for you and I’ll echo the others who said Woohoo! for smart, nice people having babies. I’m really looking forward to hearing about the whole bun-in-the-oven and baby thing through *your* eyes. I think anyone who assumes talk of babies from dooce will be like the typical parental gushing found elsewhere is way off base. Babytalk away, if you want. Very best wishes to all four of you!

  • TS

    Jesus H. Chr…errr…

    Congratulations!!!!! :o)

    There’s a navajo custom that whoever makes the baby laugh has to throw a party. A BIG party. Keep that in mind. :op

  • TS

    *ehem* sorry…

    addendum: whoever makes the baby laugh for the FIRST TIME has to throw the party.

  • How awesome! What a terrific way to make your announcement.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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