An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation


  • Bron

    Congratulations Lovelies. The site looks fantastic.

    The weirdest thing…. I saw the cowbell skit the day you were updating the site. Not strange in itself, only that I live in Australia and this was the first SNL episode I had ever experienced. The next day when I came in to check your progress, it was the cowbells again.

    Damn Will Ferrell is a big man… he stood shoulders above the other guys.

  • Lauren

    I LOOOOOVE this feature. I went to a wedding on the weekend and tried to take photos that would come out somewhat like yours after I cropped them. I should say crapped them because they suck, unlike yours. I’m so looking forward to the daily picture, I’m giggling.
    Love you Heather, you bring much to my life.

  • Like Angie said, no matter how old anyone could beat me at one-on-one basketball.
    Im glad you are back and yay for daily pictures! 🙂

  • AlbionJessica

    My fiance and I have been avid readers of your daily whimsies for almost a year now. We’re so delighted that you are on the up-and-up, and that has a whole new outlook to go with your recouperation. Yay, Heather!

  • jelene

    i forgot to clear my cache, MY BAD. it looks great now. white lovely and grey.

  • great picture.

    I wanted to ask you if you have ever heard of Steven Lynch? He is a singer/comedian and on his CD he does an amazing Christopher Walken impersonation including the “need more cowbell” stuff. ITs HYSTERICAL!

  • The background on my computer is WHITE WHITE WHITE and the font is gray. Are you seeing something different than that, jelene?

  • Manda

    That cowbell skit was just on SNL on E! the other day, so it is fresh in my mind (not the first time I’ve seen it) So Funny!
    We’re so glad to have you back. Stay gold, Ponyboy.

  • is it me, or is the background too dark with the black font? ok, i’m blind. i can overlook it, cause your posts are always hilarious and make me tinkle.

    i need me somemore cowbell, with will ferrell’s hairy belly. in a weird way, he’s hot.

    i like to smell my armpits like mary katherine gallagher. mmm. sniff.

  • I could SO not beat a 12-year-old at anything. Maybe a spelling bee.

    Does it seem like kids get really tall really fast these days? Is there something in the water that was missing when I was growing?

  • So, Heather, who do you beat at one-on-one basketball? I’m just curious, because if you’re very good, maybe he should be in the NBA someday. But if you’re not? Not so much.


  • Thank you. From all of us.

  • amie

    I hear ya on the cowbell episode! Love it, love it love it!!

    I’ve been peeking in for a few weeks now… and I am obsessed. You guys are so cool. Your photos are incredible.

  • Never mind 12 year olds, a fat baby – cute or un-cute could beat ME at one-on-one basketball!

  • My 11-year-old son kicked my ass on a bike ride last night, too. Sucks getting old. And the new sight looks wonderful in Netscape 7.2 on a Mac!

    Are you self-taught with the camera or do you have any reference books for a neophyte you’d recommend?

  • Sara

    So glad you are back! Hope you are feeling better on your new meds. Love the new design..

  • midwifegoddessannie

    By the way.. in Australia if you have a fever.. you just take some paracetamol. Maybe we could teach you crazy Yanks a thing or two…..

  • midwifegoddessannie

    Thanks for the cowbell explanation… its kind of clearer now… I think. How do you know if you need more cowbell? It must be something you are unaware of until someone points it out 😉

  • Mir

    Yay, comments! What fun! I, too, have a ginormous nephew still in the single digits but with larger feet than me. Well, had. I think I lost him in the divorce. But I was sick of losing to him, anyway. (Also, what is with the Mormons and the funky names? Does the Book of Mormon include a handy Appendix of Bizzare Yet Godly Appellations?)

  • Can we have hourly photos of Leta?

  • Why is he sitting near a nuclear warhead. That seems unsafe.

  • I love your pictures.

  • Oh pretty lovely indulging comments!! My sons won’t let me play legos with them because I don’t do it right.

  • Heather, have either you or Jon thought about licensing some of your photos for commercial use? Just a thought. I don’t know how complicated the process is, but I know of lesser artists than you two who are attempting it.

    Kick-ass new design, by the way. So user-friendly and easy on the eyes!

  • I’m so glad you are back, and I love the new look. BTW, I know this is sort of late and off topic, but your wedding dress is lovely 🙂

  • I want to see more of Leta, Plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  • love the new digs and the new pics. Now if I can figure out how to make my digital do that…

  • kp

    Heather–so glad you’re back at it and feeling better. This is a good, good thing. You’re truly an inspiration, sister. Best to you and the fam, and keep kicking ass and taking names. Great pic, by the way.

  • Mikey

    The search being:

    “low book sales” +jingle

    Um. Yeah. Boobs.

  • kimberley

    Sooo glad you are home, Dooce!!

  • Mikey

    Hey, did you know that you’re one of two websites that come up as a result of a search for on Yahoo!?

    More talk about bowels plz thx. And boobs.

  • My 10 year old cousin can wear my shoes, so I left a few pairs for her the last time we visited. Did I mention I’m 28? *sigh*

  • Great picture, I too cannot believe how fast those kiddos in my family are growing…makes you feel old, you know?

  • Deja

    Am I the only one to notice that young Britton appears to be raising a beer can as if in a toast? Or perhaps he’s merely suggesting, “I need another Coors over here, Auntie Heather!”

  • at netlix, you can request snl: best of will ferrell, 1 and 2 to see the cowbell skit. at least i’m hoping it’s there. will letchya know.

  • Lesley

    I read a few entries today and one email (I think) where someone (lamely and ignorantly) criticized your photographs. I’m just here to say that it is my opinion you have an enormous talent and many of your photos could be in a gallery (or a book).

  • Alas, must all cute babies lose their cuteness? And fatness? How many are fallen.

    Great design. Great picture. It even makes me thirsty.

  • I like the new design…except there are no pictures of the congressman and smiley, drooly frog-baby!

    I live in evil Los Angeles where owning a dog and renting an apartment do not go hand in hand (and I live next to Runyon Cyn!) so I must live vicariously through you.

    Welcome back missus!

  • H&T

    Hey, my 7 year old daughter’s name is Britton! I had nothing else to offer…I’ve just never seen another kid with her name! 🙂
    Thanks for working so hard on the site!

  • Torrie

    Reloading is not working. Help!!!
    I hope it doesn’t stay this way, I feel like I’m missing out.

  • Mliz

    The new design looks great!

    You guys are the best photographers. I just tried to capture our 8-month-old baby’s hands and feet with our crap camera. Needless to say, the pictures look like blurry ass. Could I fly y’all over for a photo shoot? Leta can come too!

    Glad you’re feeling better!

  • Wahooza! Great design!

  • Hey there. I have to say when I saw the new site design this morn. I had to do a double take and make sure I was in the right place. I really do like it though and the having a new pic everyday! It’s so nice and refreshing and seems like it might even be a new start for you!

  • Maja

    Great re-design of a great site!
    Best wishes from Canada!

  • Love the new cowbell masthead Heather! (And the “more cowbell” SNL skit for that matter)
    Glad to see you’re on your way with the new site…hope everything goes well for you!

  • AJ

    Sending hugs all the way from Malaysia! 🙂

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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