An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Equality

After slightly hitting him in The Area, as a joke, I was just playing around you see, and I didn’t hit him THAT hard, just a slight brush, he says, “You have no idea how bad that hurts. There is nothing I could to you that would cause such pain.”

And I agree, “Yes. There is nothing you could do to me, except maybe infect me with your sperm, and then there were those 13 weeks of unending nausea, and then the swelling and the inability to hold my pee for more than three minutes. Oh, and then the hours and hours of labor with contractions 10 seconds apart, and the head of the baby RIPPING APART MY VAGINA, and then the stitches, and then the constipation and RIPPING APART OF THE STITCHES, and then the six weeks of bleeding, and then the cracked nipples, oh and those bladder infections from the catheter. Did I mention the clogged milk ducts in my breasts?”

Other than that, I guess he has a point.

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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