the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Dog Park

On Sunday’s trip to the dog park with Emily I took about 4,000 photos. Maybe not that many, really, but a whole bunch, mostly of strange dogs and Emily picking up those strange dogs and giving them kisses.

We met her at the top of the park and walked down the path all the way to the end to the pond and back. Conversation included how horrible dating is (and was), about how Jon and I never really dated, so-to-speak, we just sort of moved in together because why go through all that dating shit?, and about how both Jon and Emily are descended from Mormon pioneers which makes them Mormon Royalty, and me, I’m descended from Daniel Boone which basically makes me a Queen Redneck.

I made a little pop-up picture show of our little walk because my babysitter didn’t cancel yesterday, and because I need my dog to understand that it is I who loves him most, not Emily, and so he needs to stop pining for her like some tragic Shakespearean lug nut who ends up drinking poison or killing his step-father.

Launch Dog Park

(if that link doesn’t work on your browser just click here)

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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