An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Photos of the new house

The painters we hired just finished the top floor of our new house, and while it all dried we popped in to take a few pictures. Let’s start with the new top floor bathtub/shower, where we hope to conceive our next twelve adopted children:

view of the new bathtub

And this is the deck off the kitchen where I plan to write many blog entries about Jon’s large butt:

the deck off the top half of the house

And the new fireplace. Where we will warm ourselves. With the flames of burning clogs:

fireplace

Here is a view from the deck, and there is Jon is showing Leta where he buried the body:

view from the deck

Here is the large window in the kitchen, especially lovely because we will own it:

kitchen window

Jon wanted to buy this house just for the kitchen, because he wouldn’t have to do any drilling, or stripping, or cursing:

kitchen view 1 of 3

kitchen view 2 of 3

kitchen view 3 of 3

The living room, so big that gambling is legal on the far wall.

living room

Introducing the new offices of The Blurbodoocery, the one bedroom on the top floor, where I will tell Jon every hour to please turn down his Oldies.

the new home of The Blurbodoocery

And the outlandish pergola in the backyard. Just, ridiculous. And awesome:

pergola

And the swing set, where Leta is happy to throw things down the slide including one very confused dog:

swingset

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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