the smell of my desperation has become a stench


We’re walking through the parking lot at Target, the two of us on either side of Leta, when she points up at the giant red logo on the front of the building and asks, “What do those red letters say?”

“Target,” Jon answers, and then on the count of three we swing her in the air. “Target is the name of this store.”

She looks back up at the building, points again, and asks, “What do the green letters say?”

“Those spell SUPER,” Jon explains. “Together, both words say Super Target. That means this Target is awesome.”

“That’s what we call redundancy, Leta,” I say, even though she seems satisfied with the other answer.

“Huh?” she asks, confused.

“Well, it’s kind of like saying delicious chocolate,” Jon says, trying to clarify.

“Exactly,” I say nodding in his direction. “You might as well just go ahead and call this place Super Super.”

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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