the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Children’s wellies

These are little wellies given to Leta by her Pseudo Internet Godmother awhile ago, but because Leta is freakishly small for her age (15% for height, did Jon [6’3”] and I [5’11”] really give birth to a short human? really? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? WHO IS THIS CHILD’S REAL MOTHER?) they have started to fit only now, and do we ever need them in this awful weather. In fact, they’re so cute I’m going to force her to wear them through what will surely be the driest summer in decades.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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