the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Who’s a good boy?

I know. Terrible. Awful. This is beyond mean. All those meaty treats are sitting right there transmitting deafening signals to his nose: EAAAAT MEEEEE. And yet, behold his self control. I think I may make a motivational poster out of this photo, and across the top in giant blue letters it’s going to say SUCK IT.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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