the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Disney, you total bitch

This is only half of Leta’s collection of princess books, the other half is downstairs in her room because we had to draw the line somewhere, and I guess that somewhere was THAT’S ENOUGH, OKAY MAYBE ONE MORE. These are all usually stored in the buffet we recently bought for the living room, or at least they are in the morning and within a half hour of the time she gets up they’re all out on the floor like this. And when she gets home from preschool the first thing she asks is, “You didn’t put away my princess books, right?” Now, why would we ever go and do something so horrendous as that?

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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