the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Comes with a wand and a pair of wings

My hair stylist and I were feeling adventurous today and decided to try for something similar to Michelle Williams on the cover of the most recent Vogue Magazine. And I love it even though I know that when I wake up in the morning Jon is going to look over and think he’s going to be arrested because an eight-year-old boy is lying next to him.

Leta did not recognize me when I picked her up from school, and she literally did a cartoon double-take. Her final opinion is that the hairstyle is fine, can she please have ice cream after dinner? The haircut was supposed to make life UNPREDICTABLE, LETA.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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