the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Internet, meet the Avon World Sales Leader

  • kristanhoffman

    2009/12/16 at 10:49 am

    I LOVED this video! Already commented at Momversation, but basically your mommy was adorable. AND her comments about how she would sort of check on you via your blog during your postpartum was really touching. Moved me to tears, in fact. (Granted, ESPN’s feature stories sometimes move me to tears…)

    Please tell your mommy that we Dooce fans say hello and thanks!

  • kristanhoffman

    2009/12/16 at 10:50 am


  • Daddy Scratches

    2009/12/16 at 10:51 am

    Wow, the resemblance of each mother to her respective daughter is eerie. This was like watching the usual Momversation bloggers in a special-effects bonanza titled “Momversation:2039.”

  • monique

    2009/12/16 at 10:54 am

    Yah!! This was awesome. Loved listening & watching to Linda – you have some of the same mannerisms. So cute to hear how proud she is of you.

  • fableq

    2009/12/16 at 10:55 am

    Your mom sounds exactly like I had imagined her to!

  • Hagan Squared

    2009/12/16 at 10:56 am

    “I have been her mother for most of her life” HA! Love it.

  • kth201

    2009/12/16 at 11:03 am

    “First of all, let me tell you she exaggerates a lot” ha ha ha ha! Awesome.

  • EricaLucci

    2009/12/16 at 11:04 am

    This is so awesome. You all have wonderful, supportive mothers!

  • Rosemarie

    2009/12/16 at 11:12 am

    I can’t believe how much everyone’s moms
    a) look like them
    b) TALK like them, especially Rebecca Woolf’s mom.


  • simpliSAHM

    2009/12/16 at 11:13 am

    Oh Heather, I envy you for having such a wonderfully supportive mother! The fact that she even reads your blog and wants to know how you are feeling about things…well, let me just tell you that you are lucky. My mother won’t even get the internet (even though they do have a computer) and has no idea anything about this “blogging thing” I’m doing. And well, wow, I just have to say I think it’s wonderful that your mom supports you, especially despite the whole religious differece (would love to see a Momversation on that one!) Although I realize this wasn’t the topic, this video really got me thinking about the “mom relationship”…and to think I haven’t even started blogging about my mother issues!

  • knighton

    2009/12/16 at 11:17 am

    What Daddy Scratches said. Eerie.

  • ATXGirl

    2009/12/16 at 11:23 am

    Ok… I cried when Linda said she checked up on Heather during her PPD on her blog when she couldn’t reach her otherwise… what a cool mom. (me = pregnant = crying when anything sweet happens.. haha)

  • mandi

    2009/12/16 at 11:28 am

    I enjoyed the heck out of this Momversation! What lovely mothers you all have!

  • CreatureofHabit

    2009/12/16 at 11:28 am

    Lol @ Linda Hamilton! “Well, first you should know that Heather exaggerates…” Haha….

    GirlsGoneChild’s Mom – holy shit! They look and sound exactly alike. They even have the same mannerisms and facial expressions. Freaky!

  • NolaMomma

    2009/12/16 at 12:05 pm

    Love it! And another one to agree that the similarities between the Moms and Daughters is uncanny! Must figure out a way to improve myself so my daughters have something more for which to strive.

  • Svaha

    2009/12/16 at 11:37 am

    hahahahahah I less than three how your mom has been your mom ‘for most of your life’. My spidey sense is tingling on where you might have got your sense of humor from. Kudos to your dad for surviving in such a household of women!!

  • WindyLou

    2009/12/16 at 11:37 am

    It’s so nice to see and hear your mom’s voice again. I really miss being around her! She’s still as beautiful, intelligent and well spoken as ever.

  • lori.ann.mcvay

    2009/12/16 at 11:39 am

    God be praised! I have been waiting for this day! LOL

  • Leball

    2009/12/16 at 11:40 am

    I love how you say, “Internet, meet the Avon World Sales Leader.” That was hilarious!

    But super sweet! I loved this momversation. 🙂

  • fat mum slim

    2009/12/16 at 11:53 am

    They’re all such beautiful Grandmas. Heather, I love your Mum. She’s beautiful. I see you in her. And Avon must be good, because her skin is exquisite.

    I’ve told my Mum briefly about my Blog. That was months and months ago though. She’s never seen it. But she doesn’t use the internet. She’s not old though. She’s only 49! We got her a laptop, we just need to get her to use it.

    Just in case I don’t get the chance before Christmas arrives: Thank you for sharing your life with us. Thank you for making me laugh. Thank for sharing your pregnancy, and the birth of beautiful Marlo too. This year has been great, and I look forward to a new year at Dooce. Merry Christmas to you and your family {including your MOM!} xx

  • slw

    2009/12/16 at 12:00 pm

    Heather? Fast forward 25 yrs. You are and will be just as classy! She’s awesome!

  • William

    2009/12/16 at 12:03 pm

    Would it be rude to call your mom a GILF?

  • playrawkstar

    2009/12/16 at 12:06 pm

    aww, that was crazy cute. hooray for moms!

  • Coyote

    2009/12/16 at 12:10 pm

    Sweetest video ever. I totally teared up listening to the love in their voices and how proud they are of their daughters. I wish my mom was still alive. I could sure use some of that.

  • doobrah

    2009/12/16 at 12:31 pm

    What she said was really nice, and I loved that Southern accent. Your mom for most of your life — HA — wonder what parts she wasn’t your mom for? 😉

  • Roo8382

    2009/12/16 at 12:33 pm

    Ditto @slw. The Avon World Sales Leader is everything I dreamed and more! Plus a fabulous southern accent! Heather, your mom has it going on. Great video.

  • The Prima Momma

    2009/12/16 at 12:36 pm

    Wow. Such beautiful, articulate mothers! No wonder their daughters are such rock stars.

    (I loved that your mom mentioned the therapeutic aspect of your blog during that most difficult time)

  • McMissis

    2009/12/16 at 1:03 pm

    I hate to say the same thing as everyone else, but O.M.G. every one of those moms have the exact same mannerisms of the daughters. I LOVE IT! 🙂

  • AngstyJen

    2009/12/16 at 1:08 pm

    Your mom is awesome! I can certainly see how she has conquered the cosmetics world. I’d love to have lunch with her and get her to teach me how to apply eye shadow.

  • tksinclair

    2009/12/16 at 1:09 pm

    Mom’s are so kewl!

  • SOLO dot MOM

    2009/12/16 at 1:14 pm

    What a great video. I liked the one mom who realized her liberation in “not caring” what everyone thought about her daughter blogging! You go mom of a blogger!!

  • vakadesign

    2009/12/16 at 1:18 pm

    Your Mom is awesome! There is a big, strong personality there, isn’t there?

    Her comment about your blog and depression….My Mom recently came home from The Netherlands to stay for a week and help me. She said she knew I needed help because the tone of my writing had changed; she could read between the lines to see I was struggling to keep depression at bay.

  • bea

    2009/12/16 at 1:20 pm

    Is your mom choosing which parts of your life she wants to be your mom? I had no idea that was an option, but surely that makes parenting much easier.

    Teenager caught playing mailbox baseball? Calling from police station? I’m not their mother!

    6 year old punches other kid in playground? I’m not their mother!

    Voted valedictorian of their graduating class? THAT’S MY KID.

  • ceecee

    2009/12/16 at 1:34 pm

    Your mom is a hoot! You look and sound just like her, it’s uncanny. Rebecca and her mom are way similar too.

  • e11even

    2009/12/16 at 1:48 pm

    Wow, so cool to hear your Mums feelings on the blog, and to “meet” her. What a beautiful and lovely mother you have. Thank you for sharing this, was really great, and has made me wanna call my own mum and tell her that I love her….

  • brendadog

    2009/12/16 at 2:04 pm

    Yipee!!!!!! This was awesome. The Moms of the Moms are cute!

  • d3 voiceworks

    2009/12/16 at 2:23 pm

    her friends at the ward must be s’proud!

    daily chuck: the look on chuck’s face is more like ‘gulp.’

    love. it.

  • jshove1

    2009/12/16 at 2:24 pm

    Dude Heather.

    now that I got a glimpse into how you’ll be aging accordingly to your moms preservation I can’t wait for the next 30 years of your blog.

    moisturize often.

  • CaitlinMc

    2009/12/16 at 2:48 pm

    It’s so strange to see people’s mothers speak sometimes. They have the same smile or the same face shape or the same mannerisms. I could definitely connect every mom to every blogger! Your mom is sweet!

  • springmore

    2009/12/16 at 2:59 pm

    I love your mom. She’s such a mom. “Her terrible postpartum, um, time.” LOVE IT.

  • Janice

    2009/12/16 at 3:01 pm

    Awwwwww, I never had a mom, never missed having one until now.

    Linda, ya did real good!

    Oh and also ditto what DaddyScratches said

  • kage

    2009/12/16 at 3:17 pm

    Super cute! My mom reads my blog too 🙂

  • Amanda Brumfield

    2009/12/16 at 3:17 pm

    Oh my GOD, she sounds and dresses exactly like my sassy little Mama.

  • libbyb

    2009/12/16 at 3:34 pm

    Moms ROCK!

  • jenB

    2009/12/16 at 3:35 pm

    Your mom is fabulous, funny! What a fantastic group of grandmommies. 🙂

  • jon

    2009/12/16 at 4:38 pm

    You know what I like? All these commenters ARE AWESOME PEOPLE. 🙂

  • moomlin

    2009/12/16 at 4:45 pm

    Aww, your mom is delightful!

  • Victoria_Girl

    2009/12/16 at 6:17 pm

    I absolutely LOVED meeting your Mom! From the moment she said she’d been your Mom for most of your life I knew I’d love her. She was funny, bright, touching and beautiful. Like mother like child, eh?

  • luckyme23

    2009/12/16 at 6:18 pm

    I would buy Skin So Soft from that woman just to hear the accent.

  • aerocline

    2009/12/16 at 6:19 pm

    Holy shit, Heather. Your mother is JUST AS PERFECT AS YOU HAVE ALWAYS CLAIMED. She makes me feel like a sloppy slattern, and I’m 5,000 miles away. (When was the last time I plucked my eyebrows? or moisturized anything below the neck? I DO NOT RECALL.) Anyhow. Like your beautiful mama, I, too, am “griteful” for your blog. Thank you to you and your family for putting yourselves and your adventures out there for the world to enjoy. Mahalo and aloha and MELE KALIKIMAKA from Caroline in Hawai`i

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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