the smell of my desperation has become a stench


We were about to land at SFO when I looked out the window and noticed this little guy hanging out over there. About a hundred feet from the ground our airplane pulled back up into the air.

“Air Traffic Control says we’re a little too close to other incoming traffic. We’ll, uh… need to circle back.”


Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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