Best way to roast the broomstick. Must try. Five Stars.

“Go on Sunday morning. There aren’t any lines.”

My friend Kate sent me an email last week and suggested we make a Shit Non Mormons Say When Living in Utah video. If either of us had the time to do so, it would sound a lot like this (almost all of these are her suggestions):

“Yes, you can buy alcohol here.”

“Yes, you can buy alcohol here.”

“Yes, you can buy alcohol here.”

Non Mormon trying to buy alcohol on Election Day, mumbling : “I moved here to ski.”

Non Mormon trying to buy alcohol on Sunday, mumbling: “I moved here to ski.”

Non Mormon trying to buy alcohol on any obscure holiday, mumbling: “I moved here to ski.”

“I haven’t skied in sooooooo long.”

“You get used to the politics.”

“Just ignore the politics.”


“You can’t ignore the politics.”

“You won’t ever get used to the politics.”

“Orrin Hatch? You mean Oral Snatch?

“Sundance is SO awesome.”

“I hate Sundance.”

“Oh! There’s Robert Redford!”




“Which Subaru Outback is yours?”

“You can always go to Park City if you want to get away.”

“I haven’t been to Park City in sooooooo long.”

“Park City just wants to be LA.”

“What a shit hole.”








“Powder Mountain.”


“Yes, you can buy alcohol here.”

Feel free to add anything we missed. Also, someone please film this.

  • Pandora Has A Box


    Also, my Mormon SIL was assured this morning that Mormons are not Christian. I think she needs to move to UT where people will understand her. (Full disclosure: the co-worker who said this to her is not the most intellectually capable man on the planet)

  • jen.yaya

    Well, I just figured out why I never want to live in Utah! (booze) Gee, thanks. It looks so pretty there.


  • Jenni

    Haven’t been to Park City ‘in’ soooooo long.

    And I guess I’ll never go. : )

  • Angeerah

    Yes, you can get beer at the store but it’s 3.2.

    ALTA! Dammit.

  • Heather B.

    So my first night in SLC I wanted a night cap and so I went to the bar or at least it looked like a bar but it was actually a restaurant and they said I had to get food in order to get a drink. They offered me $3 peanuts.

    And then I complained to a friend who is a State Senator (it’s like I find politicians everywhere I go)and he was like ‘thems the breaks, kid’. And I pouted. Then I went back to NY where I can drink all the Glenlivet I want until 4 AM. The end.

    Also? I loved Solitude.

  • 4Reale

    “you find people around here that are like you”

    “SLC is getting more liberal, I promise”

    “The mountains make it worth it”

    “At least you’re close to Vegas”

    “Thank God I live in Salt Lake and not Provo”

    “It actually doesn’t matter that the beer is 3.2% the altitude makes up for it”

    “Yes, our lift tickets are still under $100.”

    “I’m glad all the Texans go to Colorado to ski.”

    “During the 2002 Olympics…”

    “Have you had Epic beer?”

  • 4Reale

    “No, we don’t have happy hours, but we call it that anyway.”

    “No more drink specials, but there is this one place where you can get PBR for $1.”

    “If you move here you cannot live anywhere but SLC. You will die!”

  • chelleco

    My kids and I always say:

    We LOVE the state. The inhabitants, not so much.

    If THEY have to keep reminding everyone that they ARE Christian, they probably AREN’T Christian.

    If you ever want a Moron, oops sorry, Mormon (I’m sorry, but it can’t be a coincidence that the word moron and mormon are separated by a mere M) to listen to you or take you seriously, all you have to do is start your statement with, “Joseph Smith says”…….or more recently, “Mitt Romney says”….

    Tolerance, love, respect……….yeah, not so much.

    Incidentally, we are self described mormon expatriats, so i feel totally comfortable saying these things in jest.

    Remember the Seinfeld episode where Kenny Banya converted to Judaism strictly for the jokes? Classic!

  • deannamil

    I want it written in my will that I am never, ever to be posthumously baptized!


    The state is very pretty.

  • crivens

    It sounds just like Indiana, except with more skiing.

  • Lauren3

    Dude, sorry to talk about posts of yore on this post, but fuckit. I’ve got something to say to some people:

    Quit your misguided, immature whining. Ya’ll need a dose of reality.

    Heather does sponsored blog posts. This is because this website,, is a business that serves as her family’s livelihood. She needs to make smart business decisions. It is free for us to visit her website, and we do it because we like to read it. If we don’t like a post, we don’t have to finish reading it. It is no skin off our backs if Heather does a sponsored post, but it IS skin off her back if she declines to do them just because some don’t like it.

    Also… do you read the posts? She writes them no differently than other posts. She talks about inappropriate shit in them!

    The content of the site has changed, yes… because Heather’s life has changed. This site has given her more notoriety, so she needs to be more careful about what she puts out there. Wouldn’t you?

    And, because she’s good at what she does — isn’t it a good old American value, after all, that talent and hard work turn into success? — she’s been able to make a great living for herself and her family, and it’s given her opportunities to do unique things.

    In a previous post, someone said this: “I CANNOT RELATE to the ginormous house that looks like it came out of a magazine pictorial; the supermodel; the assistants and nannies and the trainers and the constant traveling here and there…”

    Dude…. neither can I. But if I had the money, you can bet your fine ass I would move into a nicer house. And when I do, I will. Again… wouldn’t you?

    Have you ever seen her brag about it, though? Sure, she’s posted pictures of it here and there because… this blog is about her life. And she lives there! You can also bet your ass I’d hire a dude to help me get more in shape, because ladies, I gots me some extra weight since college. Dammit.

    And yeah, she met a supermodel. Because the supermodel’s non-profit, which works on a cause that Heather is passionate about, asked Heather to help them do work. What would you have liked her to have done? Decline, because some people might not like her meeting a famous person? Miss out on a life-changing opportunity, because working with a supermodel would ruin her Everywoman appeal?

    She has an assistant because she has a business that requires an employee. She doesn’t have a nanny, for Jeebusake… she has a niece who helps her watch her kids while she works. This is help most working parents have, and the help comes in all different kinds of forms. Relatives, day cares, neighbors, etc.

    And travelling… well this gripe I just plain old don’t get. She travels to visit friends and family, and she travels on business. I don’t see what is odd about this.


    We all started to read this blog for some reason or another, and we continued to read because Heather is funny, has interesting stuff to say, and is a caring soul. I think this comes across pretty clearly in her writing.

    Now there’s apparently “weirdness” going on because Heather is going through a separation with her husband, and some of the results of that separation are awkward. But people, WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE STORY IS BEHIND THIS SEPARATION. We wanna know, duh, because lots of us have been reading Dooce for years. Does she owe it to us to tell us? Nope. But do we owe it to her to give her the benefit of the doubt and just let her work through this without getting a bunch of shit thrown her way? I would fucking think so.

    Oh, and before anyone throws out the good old “rabid Dooce defender who just wants to lick Heather’s boots” accusation/insult, to quote Kenny Powers:

    Before you say anything, prepare to shut the fuck up.

    I am a goddamn awesome friend. And no, Dooce isn’t my friend, she lives in the Internet– but I’mma speak up for her just like I would one of my friends, because I’ve been reading her for years, and she fucking deserves 15 minutes of my time to say this.

    And… it’s been a slow afternoon at work.


  • jda127

    For the record: Alta.

    And we bought our first new car shortly after moving to SLC in 2000. A green Subaru Impreza hatchback. After a week or two driving it around and losing it in parking lots, I realized I had purchased the standard-issue vehicle. Everyone! had a a green Impreza hatchback!

  • happymehappyou

    “Sorry I have no idea what ward I’m in, I’m not Mormon…”

  • Moomser

    Judging from the above comment I really need to start reading your comments more closely. or maybe not. Also, maybe it’s because I’ve been living in Italy for so long now, but I just don’t get mormons.

  • maybewithme

    No, I’m not Mormon.

    At least Salt Lake isn’t a dry county!

  • gina.b.montes

    “Oh my go…sh, yeah I was totally going to say gosh.”

  • Mindy Lee

    If you are down in Southern Utah and see all of the “prairie girls” at Walmart, no, they aren’t in a costume contest, they are poly fundies. I don’t get it either.

  • Putnam

    Lauren3, YOU ROCK! I want to lick YOUR boots! I wish everyone would read your comment. You said everything I have wanted to say (but haven’t since I can’t compose even 1 well-written paragraph). Thank you!

  • Monkey

    I was going to say something but scrolling down past a page long comment made me forget my train of thought.
    Hmm. What’s an Alta? I know an Alto. That was a shifty motel that we used to stay at in the Smokies. I think it got bulldozed.

  • seattlite

    What other posters have been pointing out is that it’s slightly disingenuous to suggest that the Daily Style has, in fact, anything to do with you. I don’t think anyone is indicting Cami’s personal value to you as a friend but it’s a little weird that you functionally re-post portraits of her without explanation. Don’t get so out of shape that loyal readers want to see YOUR style. I really miss the more accessible home and clothing finds you shared. If it’s not a feature you feel like writing then maybe discontinue it for the time being? I think it’s understandable that some of us prefer your every day looks to the more whimsical and highly editorialized perspective we’ve been treated to at length. It makes me a sad that the closest we can get to “Heather’s style” these days are the sponsored apparel/furnishing content.

  • apostate

    What do you mean which “ward” am I in? I don’t know what you’re talking about.
    Why are you rubbing my shoulder like that? What are you looking for?
    Wow, I’ve never had jello with carrots before.
    Tell me again why we’re discussing coffee consumption at drug prevention week at my kid’s school?
    Just potatoes, mushroom soup, sour cream, cheese, and cornflakes? STFU! I need to write that down.

    Chris Buttars was joking when he said that, right? He had to be joking. Nobody would seriously say that… right?

  • dlpelaez

    I think seattlite hit the nail on the head with what makes the Cami posts feel a little uncomfortable. It’s true, we can skip past them (which I do), but I still miss seeing Heather’s personal style, which (from what I remember), she had in loads. I actually do like seeing Cami’s outfits, and they inspire me to be a bit more adventurous with my own style, but because of that I already read her blog. I don’t come to for Cami, I come here for doooooooooooce.
    Beyond that, I wish I got the Utah references! Although any alcohol references are applicable anywhere in a “dry” town 🙁

  • Utahcouple

    “God I love the beauty of this state, I just wish the people of the prominent religion weren’t such douchebags”

    “Why is my address so weird? Well, you see the temple is at zero on a grid so you just go 6 blocks west and 44 blocks south and that is how you find me”

    “Our streets are this wide because brother Brigham wanted them built so a wagon could turn around without needing to back up”

    Related to above “the orange flags are here to help you cross the street without getting hit by a car”

    “They call it happy valley because they named it themselves – we call it Stepford Valley”

  • Mindy Lee

    @Utahcouple – the orange flags? They rock. The fact that people in Utah stop for pedestrians? Rocks even harder.

    Come to Vegas. We’ll run your butt right over. Just check out our local news!

    On vacation in Park City one year, we played the “subaru/pick up, dog in back” drinking game while sitting on the patio of a pizza place. The rules were loose, and within an hour, lots of shouting, 3.2 beer or not, we were all sloshed.

  • apostate

    Since the thread has been hajacked, I’ll just say that Cami’s style is a little much IMHO. I get that dooce is trying to help her career take off, but I don’t really care for her style and I think most normal people would not dress that way. I would rather see something I might actually wear in public. Just my opinion.
    Dlpelaez, be grateful you don’t get the references. It’s better than getting the references but realizing that your stuck here indefinitely because of career, and mortgages, and family.
    The shoulder rubbing refers to the garmie feel-up. And I forgot to mention frozen hashbrowns with the other ingredients. It’s fawsome.

  • Wowzers

    I wish I could comment directly under the Levi jeans entry…but this will have to do…


    I LOVE the levi style entry!! I wish that Levi would offer dooce readers a special, dooce only coupon code for like 40% off one pair of their ID jeans…ya know…just give a try? haha

    Seriously though,

    WHERE, oh WHERE, Ms. Heather Armstrong, could I find that sheer blue top? Please link us! Or maybe just email it to me?

    <3 Dooce...longtime stalker, first time commenter!!

  • kodiaksrevenge

    I ain’t here for a haircut so I will just get it out there for you to stew on. I like salt with my tequila, on my street and of course on road kill…I think we can conclude I would like SLC.

    Carry on Cherubs.

  • runhopskip

    “Oh my heck! OH MY GOD. I did NOT just say that. I need a vacation. Out of state, preferably.”

  • Absent Minded Housewife

    Obligatory Bendover gambling/fun bus comment here.

  • rincoglionita

    “What?!! You mean it’s south of 2100 South/3300 South?!!?? Jesus, that’s like driving to Vegas!!”

    “If you hit the Costco/Target in Bountiful on Sunday right when it opens, you’ll have the place to yourself….”

    (yes, I realize these two contradict each other.)

  • SimplySuzi

    Lauren3 read my mind and spoke the words. And far more eloquently than I could ever do. Thank you.

  • rivervision

    “Alta? Snowbird? No. Beaver. No, not the one in Colorado, the one up in Cache Co.”

    “200 North 300 West??? What kind of freakin’ address is that?”

    “5th North and 3rd East, I live near there.”

    “Ummmm.. Episcopalian is Christian. You know, the Church of England? It’s like Presbyterian.”

    “Happy Valley”

    “Happy Valley: the Zion Curtain.”

    To someone from out of state on the phone “Yes, we drive in the snow here. No, schools don’t close. People actually know HOW to drive in the snow in Utah.”

    “Yes, the mountains are worth it.”

    “Yes, the mountains are worth it, and especially with the lights of the temple in front of them at night.”

    “Don’t tell my LDS friends, but sometimes when I see the temple lights, I pretend it’s Old Main.” (At Utah State, and the temple = Logan).

    “MTC. Baby Blessings. General Conference.”

    Explaining “stake center” to an out of state-er “Stake center? Oh, that’s the BIG building where the wards all meet together”

    “I LOVE general conference weekend. The stores are empty between 10-12 and 2-4 Saturday AND Sunday.”

    -Brooke, in Logan (not ALL of us live in SLC or along 1-15!)

  • anne_cunningham

    wow! i rarely have the time to read the comments. had time tonight and then panned back and read the one that led into the longer pros/cons discussions over whether or not what dooce/heather is doing is right/wrong or otherwise or timing-wise on the blog, etc. etc. whew!!!!!!!

    there is no such thing as time(ing)… only change.

    i had a college professor once who said, when he’s up in front of the room blabbing his face off about this, that and the bloody other, and it just about sounds like you’ve got him figured out (he was a philosophy professor too so he talked A.LOT!!!! AND IT ALWAYS SOUNDED LIKE HE WAS ONLY TALKING ABOUT HIMSELF! so lots of times we were throwing up in our mouths a little… okay A LOT!!!) … but anyways as he went on and on and on, bending our minds talking about this and that, and this and that, and we’d think he was this or that political party follower or religious viewpoint-ish type or sexually steered toward kissing this gender or that/maybe both, just when we *thought* we had it figured out, that’s when we’d realize WE REALLY HAD NO FUCKING IDEA AT ALL WHAT OR WHO HE WAS ON THE INSIDE, OR EVEN ON THE OUTSIDE, OR EVEN IF HE HIMSELF HAD EVEN GONE TO COLLEGE IN THE FIRST PLACE … yeah, he was that good, at the game.

    it’s called LIFE.

    you know the game, the one with the little blue and pink cars and the little blue and pink pegs and the … and yeah, the rules for that game, the rules are fucking sketchy at best!

    he wasn’t teaching us who he was or that we should freak out every time he opened his mouth and said something. that’s not why he was there, even though every time he opened his mouth, we freaked out every single time he said something!!

    he was teaching us. he was mentoring us. he was good at it, fucking good and creative at it/also truly obnoxious and full of himself … and he loved what he was doing … or did he?!?!?!? maybe we didn’t even know that for sure, he did it so well!

    so those of us who think we know what’s going on here, or inside or the person, Heather, it’s not for us to say, judge, feel, or do for her… but it is a part of life to be a part of the life around us.

    this blog is on the internet which is in the life that is going on all around us.

    is this blog Heather’s big financial plan and what’s going to keep her life going, so she depends on it with the whole of her life and every Ikea project and comment on the blog?

    if the comments stop will Heather, be doomed?

    come on!

    we don’t even know that!

    we don’t know any more about her business planning or future career plans than we do about her true emotions, and that’s true of most people we encounter … it was true of my professor, and it’s true of me and you, and probably the man or woman lying next to you.

    i might think i know my best friend right now, and she might call me and tell me that she’s always really, really, REALLY wanted to be a xyz instead of zyx which she is right now that i thought she l-o-v-e-d LOVED! maybe she’s been afraid to tell me that, or maybe i know she’s an zyx right now but secretly is planning to be an xyz but until she’s ready, she’d rather that we keep it “our secret” because that’s what friends and lovers do for each other.

    that’s the way it is with people…we are multi-faceted. i’m sure Heather’s life and Jon’s life has more pieces and parts to it than we find here on this blog (business and personal wise).

    if it’s the same for me and you … if it was the same for my wackadoo professor, it’s got to be the same for them, or none of us would be going anywhere in this life.

    i can surprise my kids (and the last one left the house this year so my favorite thing to do now is SURPRISE THEM because when the nursing home talk starts in another 10-15 years they’ll need ammo so they can put me in a real shit hole!), my own best friend, my dogs, my house plants and my own damn self when i get up in the morning.

    when i look in the mirror in the morning (when any of us do this) i/we might say, “holy fuck; this isn’t it AT.ALL! *this* is actual *it*… though the previous this wasn’t actually wrong it just wasn’t so much exactly just right …”

    what makes Jon and Heather any different. Mr. and Mrs. Bridges and different. John and Joe Doe any different?

    it’s called the evolution of things, people, lives, the changing balance … and it’s pretty tremendously fascinating, and yes it can be pretty tremendously heartbreaking at times, also sometimes tremendously gut-busting hilariously pants-pissing hysterical but ultimately it’s fulfilling no matter what, and well worth the ride.

    … just as an added point since i have zero time to go back to Jon’s blog and comment on his comments (which i’ve also had time to read this week)— another thing that’s great about this particualr evolution (and gut-busting and yes difficult “no such thing as time only change”) is that Jon is writing more and his unique style of writing-both the techie nerd stuff and the techie nerd emotional stuff-is a welcome addition to my blog roll. he has a great writing voice.

    … also no one has said or not said that King IKEA–there is a King IKEA right?!–didn’t crap out all Jon’s new furniture as well. Jon has only mentioned the bittersweet/we can all relate to it allen wrench stories and the “moving to new digs/starting over” stories … nowhere/anywhere has he or anyone said IT SUCKS TO BE KICKED OF OUT OF YOUR HOUSE AND THEN ON TOP OF THAT HAVE TO BUY ALL NEW FURNITURE WHEN YOU HAVE FURNITURE OF YOUR OWN ALREADY, I MEAN REALLY HOW GOD-DAMN CRUEL IS THAT?!?!?!?

    it’s like my college philosophy professor scenario … he/no one *actually* ever *really* said any of that!

    and an added note, if you are separating, divorcing or setting up two households for any reason when you have children involved, it’s not the adults you consider first or where they get their furniture, what it looks like, who carries it, buys it, puts it together etc. what you consider is you don’t take apart the house the kids are living in and start dragging things out of their original comfort zone if you don’t have to. the fact that they didn’t have to do that is a plus.

    the fact that this meant a pile of new stuff to put together and a set of 17,000 new allen wrenches, along with extra screws that don’t appear to go to any of the new furniture, yeah, that part is a giant pain in the ass, but adults can handle that kind of pain, because they’re GROWNUPS. doy!

    as far as life and trying to time things appropriately.

    good fucking luck with that one when there is no such thing as change-constant, constant, CONSTANT change JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOU HAD IT ALL FIGURED OUT … INCLUDING THIS BLOG.

    Life (and my philosophy class, btw) it is, an always will be, a total fuckity fucked up brain-fuck and we’re all in the fuck storm together,! 🙂

    p.s. Heather paid me to write this, because if she doesn’t get 50,000 more comments on her blog tonight, this ship is going down!

    [ooops, Heather… Heather, was I not supposed to say that? … Heather, OMG! That bourbon is getting all over your carpet and look at the chip you put in the coffee table and that jagged edge on that liquor bottle, you could hurt someone with that thing! Wait, I thought this was a dry county … no, no, don’t hit me!]

  • wheezer345

    Do they still play a lot of Jimmy Buffett and Cat Stevens on the muzak over there?


  • Deborah L Quinn

    Er…would Mormons say “shit?” I mean, they say shit al the time, but would they say actually, “shit?” Just a thought.
    So I moved to Abu Dhabi, in the UAE, in August (AD not listed on your list of time zones, FYI; once again taking a back seat to Dubai, but whatever). And you know what? I think it’s Utah but in the desert and with Arabs. Yes, you can buy alcohol here; yes you can buy alcohol here; I can’t find my white SUV in the parking lot because EVERY car is a white SUV…on and on. Who knew. Mormons and Muslims: we’ve found the missing link.

  • Janie T

    @Lauren3: “her Everywoman appeal” I love that line. And Amen, sister. Well said.

  • cynericson

    To everyone who is getting crazy in the comments about Heather’s life and blog: Please step away from the keyboard!

    I think the point of Heather’s reaction (aka the “jerk” picture) to the detractors is “Really? Could your timing BE any worse? Why not just kick me in the ovaries while I’m down?”

    Because right now she is going through some tough shit. And she isn’t going to blog about it, most likely out of respect for her family and husband. We do not need to know. All we need to know is that this woman who has shared her life with us via her blog for YEARS is going through some shit.

    And when a friend or even an aquaintance is going through a tough time, you need to have a little tact. You DO NOT go up to them and say “wow, you look like hell.” Or “hey, are you eating away your sorrows, b/c you’re getting fat!”

    Which is basically what y’all are doing. I do not care how valid your criticism is. I do not care if you feel like you NEED to let her know this so that her blog can stay in business. Bottom line is that anyone with a heart wouldn’t pick RIGHT NOW as the time to bring it up.

    Heather, I’m sure you’re over this already. But just know that there are many, MANY of us out here that will come back every day to check in and offer our support. And if other people feel otherwise, fuck ’em. Let them go be tactless bastards on someone else’s blog.

  • kryssiecat

    Mmmm, hippies! 🙂

    Heather, I’ve been reading your blog since . . . I think it was ’07. The first post I remember reading is the one where someone left a beta fish for you on your front step. Every other blog I’ve started to read since I found yours has closed down for various reasons or they post so infrequently it’s only worth checking once a month.

    I love your writing. So I don’t care if you only write posts about hippos in Swahili, I will read every letter you write. Please don’t ever stop.

    Forever your fan!

  • akonthego

    I live in Santa Fe and this sounds very familiar. We bought a Subaru Outback after living here only 9 months and the people here definitely take some getting used to. But instead of Mormons we have hippies.

  • tokenblogger


    I did: “It kinda angers me that you have to start from scratch, even while at the same time having everything completely new and different plays into a fresh start.

    It’s the fresh start that breaks my heart.”

  • Rlymoody

    Shhhhh we don’t talk about “Sex” here

    “Head towards the SMALL mountains”

    “No my father doesn’t have five wifes”

    I DO NOT know the Osmonds”

  • mleah

    Should there be a character limit on these comments?

    No, really, Alta? What?

    Apparently the Cami haters missed the part where Heather said she was trying to pick up style tips from Cami to incorporate into her own Daily Style. Personally I can’t pull off Cami’s style but I do see a cool bag or necklace here and there in her photos.

  • dianemaggipintovoiceover

    i like to say “keeping up with the christiansens” (pron: krish-tee-ANN-sons …. not KRISH-tyen-senn) ‘sted of “jones,” as there is a lot of that here …

    also, “yo, conference weekend!”

    i like the idea of a X% off on some products for which your posts are sponsored, such as levis. imagine the REACH these companies would have.

    also, while i love cami and her styles (such daring!), i too wondered whuttup with all that cami. i figured you were busy dealing with family, crying, friends, traveling, starting over …

    i also appreciate that, while they’re not haters, some are ballsy enough to come and rant about your current direction. i like to read varying responses, frankly.

    and then i laugh at your defenders. they sound so … so … mormon.

  • victoriasauce

    Ugh, I hate myself for logging in to comment on the negativity.

    I’m sure Heather appreciates your support – she seems like a genuinely nice person like that. However, it’s probably better to message her personally and not in the blog comments. When you get into all THAT on a blog that isn’t about the drama — you’re opening a can of worms. Your heart may be in the right place, but it does more harm than good because it creates an opening for that negative discussion. So unless Heather requests our opinions or defense, I think the best way to support her is by posting regular, non-drama comments.

    Respect your host, yo!

  • libwitch

    My father always used to say that UT was his favorite business spot in terms of drinking and casinos.

    He always managed to say it with a straight face, too.

  • todobien

    This is funny because I am going to Utah for the first time next week to go skiing at Park City. Not Alta, so there. And everyone has been warning me about the bars never being open and that I will have to carry a flask with me at all times. That said, I’m psyched. We have one night in SLC–anything we should be sure not to miss?

  • apostate

    I second the idea for a character limit.

  • NDW1982

    I am grossed out by the entitled, whiny comments on Dooce. If you’re so disappointed in anything Heather is doing right now, why don’t you go away. Kicking someone while they are down is just disgusting. My eight year old kid wouldn’t do that shit.

  • Aprilisin


  • anne_cunningham

    @tokenblogger: i guess i should have worded it better when i said “nowhere/anywhere has he or anyone said” –meaning to say nowhere/anywhere has anyone in the “true know” about the “relationship” {{{{{{PRIVATE}}}}}} or business {{{{{{JUST AS PRIVATE}}}}}} stated who or what IKEA does or doesn’t do, exactly.

    i have now seen your comment in context to the “allen wrenches,” and the more global discussion of what it’s like to uproot, move, the various difficulties in undergoing change, growth, loss, etc. that occur in our lives (like it or not).

    it’s obvious, a VERY MANY of us can relate to what’s going on here (or anywhere) because a very many of us are ALIVE and having things going on (here and everywhere) in our lives. we are in similar and dissimilar situations.

    dialogue is flowing which is always good … and yes, dialogue is also flowing that is quite ugly (which can also lead to good–you can’t know what good looks like if you don’t know what ugly looks like).

    relationship talk always brings up heated arguments; it’s always gonna be that way. mirror, mirror on the bedroom wall, shadow/jungian stuff, we all love to hate ourselves and point the finger at someone else and say that they do it in a worse way or they did it first/invested the worst way to do it, and that we just FOLLOWED; but we also LIVE-TO-LEARN!


    recent comments about “character counts” (on comments here or anywhere in life) … all i have to say is, yes, CHARACTER.COUNTS, but it takes forever and a million days in a life to build that character and that’s why sometimes this blog, and these comment boxes (and our own lives) sometimes get UGLY, and why some days they are absolutely no-words-for how B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L things can be.

    … thanks for the link to your comment, btway since it made me trail back to read the life/learning allen-wrenching discussion where it started. 🙂

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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