An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Maximum effect

I recently needed to find a dress for a wedding that I’m attending this weekend in Nashville, and since the weather is so in between right now I decided to look for a maxi. A little too chilly for something short, not cold enough to break out my tights. There’s something really romantic and elegant about the length of these pieces, and I actually bought #3 worried that it might not be long enough for my 5’11” frame. Luckily it fits so well and is so ridiculously comfortable that I’m thinking of getting it in all available colors. This has become a weird habit of mine whenever I find something that fits. I’ll buy it in bulk because, well, it may never happen again. That’s how my positivity works! You smile? I hoard!

Anyway, while I was looking around I found some gorgeous options, and here are some in case you’re looking to add some length to your wardrobe.

(Also, I kind of want to hold a caption contest for the look on the model’s face in #1. Like, she just found out that her roommate has been eating all her gluten free crackers.)

1. Boyfriend Maxi Dress $132

2. Cap Sleeve Drawstring Waist Maxi Dress $68

3. Strapless Colorblocked Striped Sexy Long Maxi Dress $39.98

4. Ted Baker Pleated Maxi Dress $335.83

5. Serena Maxi $45

6. CA Flouncing Maxi Dress $30.99

7. Tart Delia Dress $160

8. Flounced Vertical Striped Dress $24.80

9. Koh Koh Sleeveless Cocktail Maxi Dress $50.95

10. Oasis Pleated Maxi Dress $84.38

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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