the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Second position

I signed Marlo up for a weekly beginner’s ballet class that’s held at a nearby high school. A few of the other girls in class have obviously had a bit more training and understand the teacher when she yells, “First position!” or “Plié!” Marlo is just happy to be bending and jumping and expressing that very conservative personality of hers. She might improve on technique, but she has sadly inherited my sister’s double-jointed arms. Straight lines are not in her DNA. I think her next endeavor will be professional wrestling.

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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