the smell of my desperation has become a stench

I have gifted my cousin a set of grandparents

Yesterday my cousin Kenzie came up with her daughter Maeve to watch the girls for a few hours so that I could finish up a project. When I mentioned that Kenzie would be visiting over the weekend both girls shouted in unison, “TELL HER SHE HAS TO BRING HER BABY.” They were adamant. I never did mention this to Kenzie because whenever she helps out on the weekends she may want to use it as a break of her own, she may want to leave Maeve at home with her dad. My kids require a bit of attention, sure, but not like an 18-month old who is not satisfied until she has tried to climb every vertical object in the house.

Also, it’s like my kids have turned into grandparents: “Sure, you’re special and I like you, but now that you have procreated you don’t serve any purpose other than bringing me that child.”

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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