the smell of my desperation has become a stench

A Couple Questions

1. My best friend from high school is moving to Denver soon, and I was wondering if any of you have any information about good neighborhoods or real estate in the Denver area that you wouldn’t mind passing along.

2. It’s been another crazy week at the Hamilton Family Compound, which I will gladly detail tomorrow, but in the meantime, have you heard any great poop stories lately?

Here’s mine: Yesterday I babysat my sister’s twin boys and one of them kept talking to me in this totally indecipherable jibberish and I just kept nodding my head and acting like I knew what he was talking about, but he could totally tell that I was just not getting it, so I turn around and go about cleaning up some mess somewhere and he gets so frustrated that he finally walks up to me and grabs my arm and I realize that he’s got chocolate all over his hands. At least I thought it was chocolate, which explains why I just sort of stood there, like, where the hell did he get chocolate? And since when did they make chocolate with corn?

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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