This here bringer of the pooper to the fun party

Since You Asked

Today I’m going to answer some frequently asked questions I get about this website, questions I don’t have time to answer on an individual basis because there’s this thing in my house that screams a lot.

1 – I use a Nikon Coolpix 990 to take all of my photographs. It’s a few years old, and it’s something I inherited when I married my husband. When you get married you should make sure that the person you’re about to swear your life to comes with great gear. In addition to the camera I inherited a really big flat screen TV, some lamps, a big area rug, and the most understanding heart that ever beat inside a human being. The TV is really nice, yes, but that heart is like, totally awesome.

We’d like to save up and buy this camera this year, so that we can take photographs like these, and these, and these, and these, but we may have to spend all of our extra cash on a new air conditioner so that the baby doesn’t have to sleep in her own sweat.

2 – The font used in this masthead is called Misty. That’s all I know about it. When I married my husband with the awesome heart and the big TV and the area rug, I also happened to marry into the largest font collection on earth. Make sure you marry someone who comes with fonts.

3 – The right side of my hompeage, the place with the thinking and reading and all that, those are all categories in Movable Type, not individual blogs. I probably should have made them individual blogs, though, because when I rebuild my site it takes A HUNDRED KAJILLION MATRILLION years. You really don’t want to take Movable Type advice from me. That’s what husbands are for.

4 – I am back at my pre-pregnancy weight, yes, but that doesn’t mean that any of my clothes fit the same. Things seem to have shifted here and there, and the pants I could wear a year ago won’t zip up anymore. The only reason I am at my pre-pregnancy weight is because I come from a long line of skinny Hamiltons. My father is over six feet tall and has weighed 130 pounds his entire adult life, and I inherited my body type from my father. This means that all the glorious boobage I’ve developed with breastfeeding will go away once I wean Leta which has me thinking that I will never wean Leta.

5 – I wish there were a more interesting story behind the name of this website, and I’ve tried for days to come up with something hipper than the truth, but the unhip truth is that the word DOOCE is a result of my horrible typing and spelling skills. I lived and worked in LA for four years, and people in LA like to say the word dude. The word dude is uttered all the time in LA, in casual conversation, in business meetings, and from the pulpit. Everyone in LA dudes. When I worked in an office and instant messaged coworkers, we were always typing “dude, no way” and “awesome, dude!” and then it sort of became “right on, doode” and “oh my god, doooooooode.” But I could never type it right. I was always typing “duce” and “dooce” and half of a thirty minute IM conversation was dominated by me correcting the misspelling, like, “oops, i meant dooce” and even in the corrections I couldn’t type it right. So they all started calling me Dooce. The Dooce. Her Dooceness. Wrapped up like a Dooce!

5 – Dooce is pronounced like DEUCE, not like douche or like doo-chay or dookie. Please don’t call me dookie, because seriously, given my personal bowel history, that would be entirely inaccurate.

I think that about covers it. Now I must return to Her Screamness Who Screams A Lot All The Time Every Day With The Screaming.

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