the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Femelist 2004

Instead of doing a typical year-end review of things — I had a baby, and then I got really sad and angry, and then I ended up in a psyche ward, and now the baby has teeth, it was a good year — I thought I would open up a post about the women on the Internet who have touched my life.

Most of the year-end reviews I have read include a whole bunch of links to men and their websites and then more men and then more men. It’s not that I don’t think men contribute a whole stinking bunch to this wonderful place, I just think it’s time to REPRESENT, ladies. We are writing, we are designing, we are setting standards. We are uniting, we are building communities, we are giving the world a more friendly, more empathic, more beautiful voice.

Here is just a small list of the women who have helped me survive this year:

Heather Powazek Champ
Gail Armstrong
Claire Robertson
Margaret Mason
Sarah Brown
Mrs. Kennedy
Mimi Smartypants
Sarah Hepola
Melissa S.
No Title Yet
Juliet Martinez
Tracie Masek
My Lovely Beth
French Toast Girl
Old Hag

Please feel free to post a link in the comments to the women you feel have contributed to this whole wonderful Inter-world: Designers, writers, crafters, mothers, sisters, friends, lovers, photographers, editors, painters, illustrators, geeks, nerds, dog and cat owners.

Happy New Year, Ladies. Thank you for sharing your lives with me. It’s good to be alive.

  • lizpenn

    2004/12/31 at 11:31 am

    dooce, that’s funny — i was just conversing with the estimable cinetrix (whose film site i recommend: — about why it is that, when it comes to personal websites, ladies are leading the way. my theory is that women make better bloggers because 1) we’re more inclined than men to open up and share our lives with strangers; 2) we’re more interested in our own and other peoples’ everydayness than guys are; and 3) as mothers or potential mothers, we’re used to the concept of working really hard for free — basically, we can’t say no, which is an important quality in a blogger.

    also: i just name-checked you and mimi, the founding mothers of the personal blog, in my contribution to the year-end culture survey on slate:

    happy 2005 to the blurbodoocery, and keep on writing. — liz, or sometimes dana

  • Karen

    2004/12/31 at 11:32 am

    Way to a go, Dooce. I notice you never seem to post on other sites — very generous of you to give a shout-out to your favourites here. Wonderful gesture.

    Happy New Year to you and your family.

  • Megan

    2004/12/31 at 11:37 am

    You inspire me, Ms. Heather. Keep on rolling. And check out these ladies as well:

    Happy New Year!

  • drawdawn

    2004/12/31 at 11:42 am

    a way with words, super sense of humor, an awesome mommy and a great friend.

    My year has been better because of her!

    All the best in the New Year Heather & family.

  • sam

    2004/12/31 at 11:46 am

    My best friend, Jenni, has a website about her husband, Jeff, who is in Iraq with the Marine Reserves. It started out as a way for her to communicate with his family about how he was doing, but it has turned into an incredible blog about how she’s handling all of it. She’s so funny and insightful – you owe it to yourself to read at least a little bit, especially if someone you know is serving in the war. You are awesome Jenni!

  • Gretchen C.

    2004/12/31 at 11:47 am

    Oh, without a question Miss Doxie. She’s like Dave Barry with tits, except funnier, and with cussing.

  • Meghan

    2004/12/31 at 11:47 am

    Most of my current favourites have already been mentioned, but there are a few that I love who seem to have stopped writing this past year. (as somebody already mentioned) has a book deal, should, if she doesn’t already, has a terrific attitude and I’m sure is a wonderful mother, if only she would share the details,

    and who was one of my all-time favorites but seems to have just dropped off the face of the planet.

  • Lisa

    2004/12/31 at 11:53 am

    The first blog I ever read that indeed inspired me to blog is

    I love Dooce as well and have been inspired by some of her writings.

    Happy New Year Fellow Bloggers!

  • just another heather

    2004/12/31 at 11:58 am
  • Robert

    2004/12/31 at 12:02 pm

    Me sister, Rachelle.

    Oh and, Men rock.

  • Doughnut

    2004/12/31 at 12:09 pm

    Sweet Pea is a great site….

  • christy

    2004/12/31 at 12:17 pm

    I do not really have anyone to add, since that was pretty much a list of my bookmarks and RSS feeds. But I do want to say keep on rockin’ witcha bad selves ladies. You make me feel envious, proud and empowered all at the same time.

    Happy New Year all!

  • geeekgirl

    2004/12/31 at 12:26 pm
  • galaxy

    2004/12/31 at 12:31 pm

    I love beautifulwoe on Diaryland. Her writing is emotive, human, and often funny. She’s a very special person.

  • ling

    2004/12/31 at 12:31 pm
  • galaxy

    2004/12/31 at 12:32 pm

    Sorry! I made a link but it didn’t show up. The address is:

  • Alex

    2004/12/31 at 12:40 pm

    Susana Gallardo over at

    Mimi Smartypants at

    And the imitigable Sharyn November from

    She was the first friend I made online, and have exchanged emails and messages with her for almost 10 years. She is such an incredible person, with a great wit.

    I give you all “mwahs”!

  • shauny

    2004/12/31 at 12:43 pm

    happy new year heather… you’re a legend 🙂

  • Lainey

    2004/12/31 at 12:45 pm
  • Alex

    2004/12/31 at 12:47 pm

    P.S. I’m drunk. I meant to write “inimitable” not “imitigable” in reference to Sharyn.
    Sharyn, you rock.

    You too, Doocesita!

  • KDunk

    2004/12/31 at 12:55 pm

    Thanks for sending props to the women out there. More thanks for your endless drive to keep writing and writing and writing so we can read.

    Happy New Year!

  • Chunquie

    2004/12/31 at 1:01 pm

    I can honestly say that no woman has had any effect on me at all this year. None positive, and blessedly none negative. Not online, at work, in person – nowhere.

    Sorry. That’s it.

  • Casey

    2004/12/31 at 1:02 pm

    also, Beth over at….good writer…even better friend

  • MIchelle

    2004/12/31 at 1:08 pm

    Dooce you REPRESENT strength, courageness, humor and love. I love your posts and they have inspired me.

    The woman who most inspires me every year though does not have a blog. In fact she has just gotten the hang of emails with attachments and playing Me Jong. This woman is my mom. Strong, beautiful and down to earth. Happy New Year to all women!

  • Amy

    2004/12/31 at 1:19 pm

    I have to say my homeskillet Lindsey over @ Yankee Girl Designs( she cracks me up and about 1/2 my hubby’s paycheck goes to her each month, her pieces rock my world. *waves* Hi Lindz I know your reading this 🙂 Love you girl!!!

  • Nils

    2004/12/31 at 1:24 pm

    OK … a list of blogs I check every day and sometimes several times a day … (and we can assume that is the first among equals): – Sars from (which incidentally is mostly written by women) – she’s funny, smart, and has an amazing advice column

    www. – MissAllie from TWoP, Linda is mentioned above (#45) and is just an exquisite writer – Tess is polar opposites of most of the net women I know. Some smart, funny, opinionated writing. – One of Canada’s funniest women, Cynthia does some clever stuff. – also mentioned somewhere above – funny and quirky and great food pics.

  • Amanda

    2004/12/31 at 1:33 pm

    I’m new to the blogging world, however, the first person to inspire me to write is a female scientist from florida. She is the main encourager in my writing life and I have never even met her! She is always making me laugh through her blogging thoughts!
    And of course, Heather, you are the sole purpose of my husband’s strange looks as I laugh in uncontrollable manners at our computer screen….Ciao!

  • jennifa

    2004/12/31 at 1:35 pm

    i really like jenny @ her and are my daily reads!

  • nicole

    2004/12/31 at 1:38 pm,
    cause she makes me feel less klutzy, and that’s hard to do.

    and major shout-outs to teacher blogs, who have SERIOUSLY been keeping my head above water (& my student’s heads out of toilets) for the past two years. including, but not limited to,,,,,

    great idea, heather! i will come back to this page and link to some of these ladies when i’m looking for the bloglovin’.

  • Mrs.Stray

    2004/12/31 at 1:43 pm

    I pretty much read most of the blogs that are connected to the names of people who post here.

  • Jakk

    2004/12/31 at 1:44 pm

    There would be no magic in my beans if it weren’t for the talented Amanda at

    Thank you, Dooce, for making me laugh out loud when I needed it most. Happy New Year!

  • elli

    2004/12/31 at 1:46 pm

    just a few that keep me going, make me laugh, and remind me to notice the little things:

    thanks, dooce, for posting this and being one of those ladies on my list.

    happy new year.

  • Doug

    2004/12/31 at 1:48 pm

    Our new daughter-in-law turned us on to you, Dooce. Now you’re one of my fave web chicks, right up with my wife, Katy.

  • abc

    2004/12/31 at 1:53 pm

    LOVE The Midwestgrrl.

    and just discovered Ordinary Morning.

  • Jennifer

    2004/12/31 at 1:59 pm

    I check Stacey’s journal every day, so funny:

    And you! Of course!

  • me

    2004/12/31 at 2:10 pm

    I’m going to say me because I should be grateful that I get out of bed every morning instead of putting a gun to my head. Gotta love the depression.

  • Cin

    2004/12/31 at 2:16 pm

    So many new links to explore ! But I’ll always begin with your site and

    many thanks to you ladies for all you have taught me !

  • jm

    2004/12/31 at 2:18 pm

    Dooce is still tops and Mimi Smartypants was my first blog crush 🙂

    Other daily musts for me:

    Sars! –
    Sewgeeky! – (nothing more irreverently funny)
    Heather @ the Stitch! –
    Ilsabe’s Daily Special! –
    Lisa –

    And to women who can really pull their weight when it comes to power tools (in the normally male dominated world of old house renovation) They keep me motivated

    Chateau Ste. Mold –
    Housemade –
    Heather –
    and, especially,
    “The Wife” @ Brickman House –

  • Kelly

    2004/12/31 at 2:19 pm

    Heather, this post of yours seriously makes the shit flow.


    Lisa B-K:

  • jm

    2004/12/31 at 2:20 pm

    p.s. Ilsabe @ Daily Special is also a great friend and neighbor who mixes an AWESOME drink 🙂

  • Wanda

    2004/12/31 at 2:21 pm

    What a nice post! Heather, you are both sweet and a bitch (in the best sense of the word)!
    I’ve been inspired by you and in both my thinking person and my inner artist!

    Best to you and Jon and lovely, Leta in 2005!


  • Ruth

    2004/12/31 at 2:22 pm


  • DM

    2004/12/31 at 2:23 pm

    flea at and frog at I think they are completely awesome and am so glad I found their blogs because they led me to yours. Also and They are very cool.

    And then there is Heather, you amaze me. I look forward to another great year.

  • Sweet Pea Kate

    2004/12/31 at 2:23 pm

    WOW! I’m humbled to make the list. Really.

    Here some amazing woman who are basically amazing:
    she is pure beauty…thougtful and wonderous.
    Robyn’s brilliant mind will inspire you like no other
    Katey is delight
    LaDonna’s Poetry is mesmerizing. Her talents overflow.

  • Coelecanth

    2004/12/31 at 2:29 pm

    Not that anyone is going to see it way down here but Esther at is great. Funny, moving, smart and well written. Worth a read even if you’re not Jewish or single.

  • jane

    2004/12/31 at 2:32 pm

    You and Brenda ( are the two bloggers I read every day. You both inspire (and amuse) me in different ways.

    Happy New Year!

  • falimako

    2004/12/31 at 2:35 pm

    I love Tertia at and of course her whole “Vagina Posse”. They are such brave, strong women.
    Claire at Loobylu has been mentioned, but adore her because she was inspiration to learn how to knit, something I now do almost every night, and something that has cheered me up this year.
    And of course, for helping me to realise I can be myself and not feel ashamed of that.

  • robyn

    2004/12/31 at 2:36 pm

    i have to say how rockin’ happy i am that both katie (sweetpeakate) and dooce are on this list! these women rock the house …

    me, i’ve got a blog list of like 5 million, mostly women. i guess checking them out would be easier than me having to write them all out here …

    cuz i’m lazy!!!

  • Nell

    2004/12/31 at 2:38 pm

    Fatima, from Dubai, is a big inspiration for me. She finds beauty everywhere and shares it with the world in her photos:

    She is also a model, even though her society shunned her. Talented and independent, she’s a role model for me.

    Happy new year, Heather!

  • robyn

    2004/12/31 at 2:44 pm

    i have to make sure i put her up here … she has been so good to me! wonderful woman, just amazing!

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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