the smell of my desperation has become a stench


Today as I was driving to the grocery store I stopped at a four-way intersection near an elementary school. It’s a four-way stop as well as a cross-walk, so I had to stop anyway, but before I even pulled to a stop two kids just walked across the street having full faith that I wouldn’t hit them. I had to think, am I doing them ANY favors by letting them get way with that? Don’t they know you just can’t go around trusting people?

Then I had the notion that maybe I’d just nudge them with the front of the truck, a gentle warning nudge that says, “Hey, you. You’re too young to know this yet but even though the sign says STOP not everybody is going to stop. You’re taking a huge risk thinking that everybody is going to follow all the rules all the time.”

But I knew I couldn’t do that, not only because that would be considered assault with a deadly weapon, but because I’d be incapable of a gentle nudge. I’d more likely run them over as if to say, “LIFE IS FUCKING HARD, AND THEN YOU HAVE TO BREASTFEED. BE PREPARED.”

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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