the smell of my desperation has become a stench

My big girl

Leta must be experiencing a growth spurt because she has eaten three full meals a day for several days in a row. Jon and I both know that this probably won’t last, so every time she eats a good meal we shower her with positive feedback like, “Such a good girl!” or “What a big girl!” or “Look who didn’t give Mama a heart attack! YOU! YOU DIDN’T GIVE MAMA A HEART ATTACK!”

Tonight she ate several peanut butter crackers and a small serving of pasta, a veritable feast considering that one day last week she ate nothing but mustard, and when she was done a smile exploded across her face in anticipation of the praise she had earned. Before I could get a word out of my mouth she screamed, “A good girl, huh?” And she kept repeating huh? because that’s all Jon and I ever do, keep asking each other the same question over and over again because the other one stopped paying attention two sentences ago.

“Yes,” I gushed. “You are the best girl.” It was one of those moments as a parent that make me so drunk with pride that I really thought I could prove that fact objectively.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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