the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Hey Dad, looks like I married the right one

That’s a whole 40 cents we saved on groceries tonight, and if I had let him Jon would have stood on top of the conveyor belt at the checkout stand to proclaim his magnificence to everyone in the store, he was that proud of himself. I’ve never seen Jon use a coupon, never even suspected he would be so enthusiastic about it, but let’s just say that this is a side of my husband I wouldn’t mind seeing more of. In the future if he finds that I’m not in the mood, all he’ll need to do is lean over and whisper 40 CENTS, BABY, and I’ll run and get the butter.

Good news for Jon: that new computer he wants? Only 25,998 coupons away. I’m counting.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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