An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

20 weeks

  • Jenn

    Awesome photos!

  • Allie

    Fantastic! Adorable! I could not love this more if I tried.

  • OK dude. That rocked. Yr freaking gorgeous. Adorable. Took away my grumpies! xo

  • Maggie

    The second photo is becoming my background. The awesomeness is too much to be contained.

  • thats what my belly looks like!! If only I were pregnant…….

  • Heather-in-Australia

    The wand kind of looks like you cheerfully cut off then decorated Jon’s penis just to fuck with him for those 17 pounds.

    But seriously, you look GLORIOUS :).

  • Anna

    Dooce, you are awesome. The end.

  • Anonymous

    You look like the crazy fairy, coming down from on high to steal both the quarters and teeth from your pillow, shorts, and mouth.

  • Arlene

    A certain four year old just stopped in her tracks, wherever she is, and started screaming “TAKE. OFF. MY. TIARA.”

  • Liz

    You’re pictures made me smile…and laugh a little bit. Glad you’re feeling better!

  • OH MY GOD I love these!! Glad to hear you’re feeling better.

  • Megs

    Laugh-out-loud hilarious! SOOooo glad to see you’re “enjoying” yourself. 🙂

  • Fiona

    Thanks for the laugh!!

  • Donna

    You’re funny and beautiful!

  • OMG! That was terrifying, and I’m not talking about your bare midriff. I don’t think I’ll ever recover. I just need to go shake it off I think. =)

  • wow. that outfit is ridiculously amazing.

  • If it’s any consolation- my food “baby” looks like your tummy! Love the site- can’t wait to read the book too! oxxo

  • WOW.

    I have been struggling with ideas for my belly shots….maybe I’ll dress up like a gnome.

  • I got all my maternity clothing from Target’s bedding section. Much cheaper than pool covers.

  • You are a dork. I mean that in the best way. :)))) You look amazing!

  • Anneka

    Only slightly creepy! Love the outfit!

  • You are smiling! I LOVE these photos! LOL!

  • Jodi G.

    Okay the tutu is a nice touch! I’m happy you are having a little sister for Leta. So I have to put in my 2 cents for a really cute name. Olivia. Because you could call her Livie and Leta and Livie sound really cute together (Well I think so at least)

    Anyhow, I love your website and ALL your smart ass comments! You rock!

  • That. is. HILARIOUS! Best pregnancy photos ever.

  • you’re adorable!!

  • Erica

    This just made my day. My ice cream for lunch baby is giving that one a run for it’s money.

  • When your photos appeared on my feed reader, I laughed out loud. As in, echoing off the walls of the den loud. Happy 20 weeks, and thanks for making my day!

  • Kim

    You look great!

  • You are beautiful! I adore you!

  • You look just a little cuckoo here. But I guess that comes with the territory. Fetus making > sanity.

  • Delurking to say “crazy beautiful” is my favorite kind of scary, grumpy pregnant fairy!

  • Korina

    I have had a shitty couple of days and venturing over here was the right idea. More often than not, you are hilarious.

    Looking great!

  • Oh my, love it! Very funny 🙂

  • Best. Photos. EVER.

  • You will now never be able to deny your daughters the chance to dress like ballerina princesses. They’ll just point to these pictures and say, “But YOU did!”

    You look gorgeous. Like the crazy hormone fairy – bright, sparkling, and full of goofy pregnancy hormones. 🙂

  • Ingrid

    Baby #2 is going to cherish these photos when she’s older! Assuming she inherits that awesome hamilton/armstrong sense-of-humor combo! 🙂

  • You are Awesome!!
    Glad you’re feeling better!!
    This was THE BEST!!!

  • these are rad.

  • If I thought I would look that good pregnant, I would throw out the birth control pills immediately. And you know, have sex with someone.

  • I LOVE IT!! You are giving me inspiration for the “belly shots” we are having done next month!

    And, there is nothing better than the 6 pack of panties that makes up a small load of laundry! They are the surefire thing to wear when you want to get your husband “out of the mood”!

  • Ha! You are so awesome.

  • Mindy

    I love your expression in the second photo . . . too cute.

  • I love it.

  • dessessopsid

    What a delightful tutu!

  • You will have to frame the last belly pic and this one together. Nice contrast.

    By the way, that tiara may come in handy to wear during housework. I hear it helps.

  • Hm… something looks different. Did you cut your hair?

  • Anonymous

    Not sure you have any interest but Carolyn Jessop will be at Barnes&Noble in Sugarhouse tonight at 7pm for her book Escape.

    Love the pictures! You look great!

  • Love the tutu! ;o) I wish I had kept better footage of my belly-progress during my pregnancies with my daughter and twins! Great shots!

  • My belly is still bigger than yours and my baby is 15! I can see the princess vibe is alive and well in your house…

  • AN

    i wish i could look that good. 16 weeks with baby #2, and i’m appalled that my belly now sticks out when i’m laying down.
    congrats on feeling better.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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