the smell of my desperation has become a stench

Maternity trench coat

I found this trench coat in the maternity section at Target, and although it’s pretty thin and doesn’t provide a lot of warmth, it’s big enough to fit around my growing belly and dressy enough to wear for several upcoming engagements including my book tour. I’ve already reached that point in my pregnancy where I’m generating my own heat with enough left over to power a small Caribbean island, and the thought of wearing a coat makes me choke with the prospect of suffocation. So this trench is just heavy enough, and the cut is such that I’ll be able to wear it long after I’ve given birth.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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