An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

Zen master vs. toddler on meth

  • Andra

    Sweet Mother of God, THE SQUEAKING.

    I had to rewatch the video twice because I was so distracted by that horrifying noise.

    I say that because, as the proud owner of a teething puppy whose favorite past time is seeing how many times she can squeak the squeaker in 60 seconds by chewing on her “Wubba” Kong toy. By my bleary 5:00 am estimations, it’s at around 85 SPM (squeaks per minute). Problem is, she ONLY takes interest in the squeaky toys. I cherish my unchewed baseboards and ungnawed table legs too much to wean her off of them at this point.

    She is hereby known in our house as Her Squeakness Who Squeaks All Day Every Day With The Squeaking.

    Chuck and Coco rock. Squeak toys do not.

  • Jen S.

    Seriously, Jon is a magician and I want his secret for getting Coco to stay so far away from the camera during all that Chuck-love. My #2 pup would have intervened IMMEDIATELY.

  • Vote for Chuck, future leader of the free world!

  • Oh my gosh. No wonder you can balance anything on Chuck’s head!

  • Laura

    I ♥ Chuck.

  • rb

    I didn’t believe you before, but you’re right. Chuck IS a cat.

    (Coco is my six year old son, but that’s another story which will probably eventually involve Ritalin.)

  • I just laughed my ass off. That was the greatest video I’ve seen in a long time. Thanks.


  • My friend’s dog was curled up on the floor, happily napping, until she heard Coco’s toy start squeaking. She started frantically looking around the room, trying to figure out who was squeaking her toy and if they were going to throw it and where the hell that sound was coming from, because I wasn’t throwing the damn squeaky elephant already. It was kinda funny.

  • Every time Coco squeeked that toy, my dog would run in to see if I got another dog.

  • Lyla

    Hee hee. I love your dogs. Even Coco.

  • Also, you know what would be great? Is if I knew how to spell “squeaked.”

  • Is that a low growl at the end or a jet flying over?

    I think the moral of this video is that Coco wants a Toyota. I love how when Coco starts his squeaking Chuck just closes his eyes like “It’s coming from both sides now. Very feng shui…roll with it…”

    I’ve watched this video like 9 times.

  • Anonymous

    Chuck just doesn’t give a shit, does he? And Coco, she is just loco!

  • Chuck is a rock star. Coco is adorable probably because I don’t live with her. I love how you chronicle their lives with pictures. Animals rawk!

  • Jennifer

    LOL I would totally love to see more interviews with Chuck and Coco. You guys make me giggle. Thanks!

  • Oh my goodness, I am absolutely dying over here! LOL! Chuck is quite possibly my favorite dog I’ve never met. And “toddler on meth” is the most hysterically accurate description of the Coco I imagine when I read your blog, lol.

  • this made me “LOL”

  • My dog is a mix of Chuck and Coco 🙂

  • Keara

    That is like the K-9 version of ‘The Diving Bell and the Butterfly’. Chuck’s blinking browns are telling a story.

  • Chriss

    Chuck Rocks.

  • that is hilarious. Plus, my dogs were looking at me like, “what is up with all that squeaking!?”

  • Jen-uh-fer

    I heart Chuck.

  • I want to marry Chuck so I’m divorcing my cat, Jerry Garcia.

  • SarahW

    Both of my dogs came running into the room barking when they heard the squeaker. Oh the little things that amuse them.

  • Nataliya

    Awesome video. He seems so old and wise. And shy.

  • I am not a dog person, but I adore Chuck. His personality suits me perfectly. Love the video. I’d love to see more Chuck interview videos.

  • Rebecca C

    This is the precise difference between my daughter (almost 4) and my son (7 months), although she is Coco; he is Chuck. Never has this been so succinctly and eloquently captured.

  • Staci

    i love chuck! he is my favorite ‘famous’ dog and i really think he needs his own show…

  • My damn dogs came running in a fit of panic, barking “Where is the squeaky toy!? Give us the damn squeaky toy, woman!”

  • Andy

    Chuck wishes you would not put carpet over that beautiful hardwood floor in the nursery. Chuck thinks you are making a BIG mistake doing that. But Chuck does not mind the carpet in the basement.

  • SarahW

    P.S. Just cracked open a new box of Crunch ‘n Munch.

  • I was going to find something to watch on Hulu but this was so much better!

  • Ha! My dog took off trying to find the toy as well. She’s sitting on the couch looking very depressed at the moment. Life is tough.

  • lynn

    I think if Chuck had a pair of ruby red shoes on right about now he would be clicking them together and wispering…GET ME OUTTA HERE!

  • Laura

    Let me translate:
    Chuck: “Are you f*&^ing insane? It’s a Porsche or nothing, asshole.”

  • Oh jeez, Chuck just makes me bust a gut. I have never “met” such a boring, HILARIOUS dog.

  • Wow – that squeaking would get tiresome. My parents are going to get a (another) Australia puppy this summer. Truly adorable. and Gave me ONE MORE REASON TO PROCRASTINATE, so thanks for that!

  • I would give anything for my dog to act that way. Mine would be joining Coco in the back. No wait, if it were MY husband talking, Bear would be trying to stuff himself down my husband’s shirt.

    That pretty much sums up my Aussie.

  • That was surprisingly hilarious. I watched it more than once. And then I sent it to my mom!

  • Tracy



  • Liss

    Hi Dooce,

    Great video. That is sooo our 2 dogs. Question from my husband: What is Jon shooting with? Is it the 5D MKII? I think he has a bit o’ camera envy.

  • Chelsea

    OMG – they are BOTH like the long lost twins of my two dogs. I love it.

  • I can totally picture Chuck leading a Learning Annex Workshop called Controlling Your Temper With Your Eyebrows.

  • MamaLana

    I really love Chuck. What a good dog.

  • Laura

    As much as you can love a dog via the internet, this is how much I love Chuck!! And I love your blog… I read every day and it always makes me laugh. Thanks for that!

  • I think this makes it clear that Chuck doesn’t believe in America’s auto industry – or in America, generally. He’s such a liberal euro-hippy commie elitist. But so hot.

  • This is so funny and CUTE! What the heck was Chuck looking at that kept him so intently focused? I just love that dog to pieces.

  • sue

    Okay you two, here’s the deal. It’s not that Coco is so naughty, it’s just that Chuck is so P*E*R*F*E*C*T.

  • robin

    Oh my god… that was so great.

    I have an aloof chocolate lab rescue, matilda, that would just love chuck. wouldn’t be as annoying as coco but would sqawweeeeek (sp?) anything available.

    first time caller, long time reader. good luck with the new baby!

  • Sam

    I had the worst night, and this just totally made me laugh in spite of it. Thanks for the smile.

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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