How does something so small and helpless bring the entire world around her to a screeching halt? I know I was guilty of once thinking that a newborn couldn’t be that much work, right? You just go about your business when they’re taking a nap, duh. EXCEPT WHEN THEY NAP ONLY WHEN PHYSICALLY ATTACHED TO YOUR BODY. And that’s when you have to retrain your body to do basic tasks with either one arm or one hand, and then balance this or that on one hip, and then it’s OH MY HELL WOULD YOU HOLD THIS KID SO I CAN BRUSH MY HAIR FOR GOD’S SAKE. If this were some sort of athletic event the score would be Marlo 75 to Jon and Heather are passed out on the field.