An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

The Cuteness

  • Milla

    mine talks! i used to think it would be cool to have a talking dog, but after having one, not so much, especially on sunday mornings when i want nothing more than to sleep in.

  • KT

    Coco kept her shit relatively together! No full blown spazma attacks!
    That deserves a treat.

  • kellyjcallahan

    Very cute family members. I’m afraid we top you all right now with 2 dogs, English Cockers named Jazz and Katie, 2 cats named Smudge and Elsanora Mama Gatta, and 2 bunnies named Honey and Sugar.

    While my dogs don’t talk, they do watch TV. Which would be very cute, except for the barking. I find it utterly amazing sometimes that they can be asleep or in another room and they SENSE that dog on TV and they must come and bark at it.

    I too am impressed that Coco kept it together!

  • Jet62879

    The last part with the coughing is the best part of the whole video. Dogs have such weird quirks!

  • shestumbledin

    The end was awesome! Nicely done Chuck. And Alice, I can completely relate to that huge pussy. We have two full grown shelter cats. One weighs 6 lbs and is gorgeous and lean. And then we have GIGANTOR who was an adorable kitten with an extremely long tail who has grown into approximately 22 lbs of ?! Fur? Flab? I dunno. It’s hard to manage the big fellas weight and insure that the other cat doesn’t starve to death.

  • kaptaink

    The coughing thing made me smile. Chuck looked so, I dunno, disturbed, by the coughing.

  • heatherdotcom

    Chuck is simultaneously the cutest and weirdest dog ever.

  • kristanhoffman

    LOL I should have known you’d make a pussy joke…

    Also, I agree with KT (#2)! Coco was practically an angel in that segment. A kissy angel, but an angel nonetheless.

  • HDC

    So, Heather, ever considered slipping that emo pooch of yours some of your meds? He’s sensitive? I guess that’s one way to put it!

    By the by, does he do the same thing if anyone sneezes?

  • meowsk

    Oh how I love animals! I am with you Heather, if I wasn’t married there is no doubt in my mind I would be the crazy lady with 50 or so cats.

    But for now it’s me, my husband and our lovable, somewhat cross-eyed, Siam-Tabs cat Lucy.

  • ninesandquines

    chuck is so neurotic that it is adorable 🙂

    like kellyjcallahan, our zoo outnumbers yours also…three dogs, two horses and a barn cat who just adopted us….

    so what did you have coco drugged up on??

  • Caitlinjane

    Chuck is so unbearably adorable. I love that skinny mutt look, he’s a dream dog!

  • ohelisabeth

    That’s it, Dooce. We’re moving in with you. Cute glowworm babies, precocious and hilarious leta, ADORABLE dogs. You’ve exceeded the level of awesomeness allowed in one household. We’re packing our bags and moving in with you guys. I think it’ll even things out a bit.


    heather, we are the same people. well, except I have two weirdo furrball cats instead of two weirdo dogs. and you are tall and thin and I am short and not thin. and your husband can do computer stuff and mine would rather be a lumberjack. otherwise, the same! (our girls are even the same ages)

    ps now I see why you have kept Coco. she really is cute.

  • Julie Nixon

    The cough cracked me up.

    Our dog gets scared and takes off, her head low, whenever my husband sneezes (but she doesn’t even lift her head up if I sneeze). We adopted her at age 10, and she was already neurotic – I take no responsibility!

  • RoseTattoo

    You should totally have DNA testing done on Chuck — it’s like $60.

  • kristenf7

    I love how Chuck gave you that look that germaphobe people give you when you cough. The “OMG I must go wash my hands NOW” look.

  • doublebuttons

    I, too, had a big pussy. Oddly, my neighbor has an identical big pussy.

  • jessilee

    haha #17 I had the same exact thought. It’s like Chuck went “Oh god, some are SO rude!” Like you just coughed in his face while talking about having the plague.

    I love dogs and cats and even guinea pigs(just because the jump when they move) but my husband doesn’t want pets. Maybe when the kids are older. Until then I have a few finches that drive him batty with the singing.

  • andygirl

    I think maybe Chuck is just a germophobe. He doesn’t want to get sick.

  • Mommamel09

    I think Chuck has been watching too much CNN and happened to catch the segment about pets catching the H1N1 virus. He’s just being cautious and a tad paranoid.

    Coco cracks me up.

  • mrs.notouching

    I can relate to Coco

  • jilllovesbacon

    Love Chuck. My fabulous, neurotic, rescue dog leaves the room every time I suck in my breath when I’m scared/startled (usually while watching TV), but comes running back in when I’m laughing. He’s the best.

  • aynwinter

    aw – we used to have a big fat all-black cat like that too. his name was Ike. he wasn’t allowed on the kitchen counter and at 20+ lbs struggled to get up there. when he spotted us spotting him there he would make a little eeping sound and hide behind the banana holder. so darn cute even though not at all inconspicuous. he passed away a couple years ago and i miss him terribly.

  • Annie

    omg they are all so cute, even the giant pussy!

  • Happy Dog

    A friend of mine, who is a big fan of, steered me to this Momversation. Adopted mixed-breed dogs are like boxes of chocolates… sometimes very goofy boxes of chocolates.

    I don’t normally go promoting my business on other peoples’ blogs but since RoseTattoo suggested getting Chuck’s DNA analyzed, I thought I’d join in on the conversation. The DNA test is only $60, the results are quick and it’s fun to know what your dog is made of.

  • Laurel

    I may have previously commented on this particular… horror, but it’s worth repeating. You think Coco eating her own poop is gross? It is. What’s grosser? The night my three-year-old had just left a giant deposit in the little Baby Bjorn potty (now known as the dog bowl), and as I was cleaning her up, strange noises began emanating from the bathroom. I screamed so loud when I realized my pinhead of an Australian Shephard was EATING THE POOP, my boyfriend came running upstairs ready to call 911 and do battle with the intruder. I filed that one under “Too Gross For My Own Blog.”

  • Mari

    They are afraid. They’ve been watching too many news reports about swine flu. Seriously, very funny!

  • TexasKatie

    That is the most awesome video ever. My dog is a perfect mixture of Chuckles and Coco. She is very reserved in her own way, but she is more neurotic than Coco could ever be. My dog was a rescue dog also – and all they told me when I got her was “Yeah, make sure she has a crate”. Hmmm. Okay. So I get her a crate. Turns out she has massive separation anxiety and first time I left her alone in that crate she clawed her way the hell out of the crate to the point she had bloody paws. I had to spend about 2 grand on a dog trainer to teach my dog to not be so much of a psychopath. But really? She is the most lovely, sweet dog who wouldn’t hurt a fly. You could pull a porkchop outta her mouth and she would lick your face instead of bite your hand off.

    It is wonderful how even when our pets are psychos in their own way, they are still such a blessing. I can’t imagine life without my neurotic dog.

    And seriously? I want to kidnap your dogs. They are so effing cute. And the coughing part of that video? Made me wet my pants.

  • dittoditto

    I’m convinced Coco has nothing on the craziness of our 1 year old sheltie, whose most recent habit involves eating the crotches out of our underwear. Yes, it is nearly as disgusting as it sounds. She only goes for underwear that we have worn, and she licks and/or bites the most disgusting parts until I am later doing laundry and I go to fold a pair of cotton briefs and lo and behold! it has somehow morphed into a ring of fabric attached to an elastic band. Where is the crotch of said panties? Down the gullet of or dog, where it is likely mingling with the armpits of our t-shirts, the soles of our shoes, the moldy undersides of our bathroom mat, the recently dumped contents of our sink drain, and of course, any and all things resembling poop.

  • steeletig

    I have an enormous black cat too, I adopted him at 2.5 weeks old as a *tiny* kitten, dropper fed him until he was old enough for food and he’s always been fed a strict amount of food daily… and he’s still huge. His brother eats the same amount of food and is a skinny little cat. So funny.

  • Dogmom

    OMG, you really do balance things on Chuck’s head! I really thought it was PhotoShop all this time. And Coco, well, I warned you. ‘Nuff said. What a love she is. Despite. it. all.

  • AngryBaby

    A – The haircut looks supercute.

    B – My dog also excuses himself to another room if I cough. Sneezing makes him politely hurry out. I can’t help but wonder if I’ve somehow said something horribly rude in dog-speak.


    Well, at least now we know that in order for you to gain complete privacy, you’re going to have to come down with a case of Tuberculosis.

  • arishell

    I had to laugh when Chuck got up and left the room! Of course Coco had to help herd him!

    Too funny!

  • annehayes

    Loved the momversation – we had a poopeater on our hands too. I learned a trick from “it’s me or the dog” (i know, i know)…. pineapple! if you want coco to stop, just give her a few cubes of canned pineapple (or chuck if she’s sampling his brand). supposedly it makes the poo taste terrible. it worked for us!

    BTW, just finished ‘it sucked and then i cried’. as someone who’s trying to have a kid, thanks for such an honest, tell it like it is account.

  • whattapup


    I love the look on his face when you cough. Parker will do the same thing (but includes a dirty glare) if anyone says the F word in his presence. I blame it on Daddy and his video games.

    Great pups & great segment.

  • Lena

    You look gorgeous; I love your hair.

    It seems to me that Chuck is English. He gave a “How very dahhhhe (dare) you!” look following the cough. I think I love him.

  • samantha

    Dude. As a Georgia girl, I give that there accent of yours an A+

  • Bree

    O – M – G laughing to so hard at them running away from you coughing. TEACH ME! Our Dane is constantly in our faces. We love him but sometimes it’s nice not to have Great Dane drool dripping off your chin.

    And I love how your accent kinda slips in every now and then. I would pay money to see a video of you saying the most quotable lines from Steel Magnolias.

  • bfmchoul

    I love the aversion to coughing. I have a cat who hates it when anyone coughs or sneezes. He’ll meow until the offending face apologizes, then he shuts up.

  • OtakuGirl

    I was so worried they wouldn’t show the coughing bit but then they did and I let out a joyous GUFFAW! That’s right, a guffaw. That was classic. After hearing all the stories from you about Chuck and then seeing it in action… it just cracked me up.

  • The Mommy Gap

    We have a spaniel mix who feels the opposite about coughing. If you cough she becomes very concerned, and checks your face to make sure you’re still breathing.

  • d3 voiceworks

    that cat rules.

  • cassidy.stockton

    That was too cute. My family has a mini dachshund who freaks, I mean FREAKS out when two people hug. You can stand near each other, but when you actually hug she goes into spastic barking/growling fits until you release. Needless to say it makes goodbyes more difficult.

  • The Prima Momma

    Chuck is doing his part to avoid H1N1!

    Also, when Coco eats her poop, she is saying, “Thanks, mom, for the awesome, high quality dog food. It’s so good I’m going to eat it TWICE.”

  • LyndaN

    Chuck & Coco FTW! ♥

    I loved when, as soon as you mentioned what Coco likes to eat, she looked to you for kisses. HAHA …yeah, I’ve waited ’til the minty cat litter scent faded to kiss my dogs.

    And Izzie (Izzy? Issie?) is beautiful, Alice!

  • Kate Hanke

    Animals make it all worth it!

  • Kim

    I can’t rave enough. I have always been obsessed with Chuck and Coco, but it was so cool to see them in action. Chuck is an emo hero (and please do more video of his “balancing act”!), and Coco KILLED me when she was kissing you as you talked about her poop eating.

  • DooceFan4Eva

    I LOVE how you referred to Coco as, “our mistake”! I mean, Chuck and Coco are so polar opposite. CUTE!

Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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