An unfiltered fire hose of flaming condemnation

A skill we’ll revisit

Me: “Marlo, you have to move your hips around like this. Watch… see?”

Marlo: “…”

Me: “You can’t just stand there. The hula hoop is not going to move itself.”

Marlo (spins hula hoop with both hands and just stands there): “…”

Me: “See how I’m moving my hips? Your hips have to move it around.”

Marlo (shakes as if a cold shiver has run through her body and then just stands there): “…”

Me: “How about we come back to this later?”

Marlo: “THE WIGGLE ISTHN’T WORKING.”

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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