the smell of my desperation has become a stench

I put my hand up on your hip

Time again for me to look for a new iPhone case as the one I currently use has been scraped, dropped, scratched, grated, chafed, and smudged with all the substances that accompany little children. I just googled “how dirty is a cell phone” and I found more than one study that says it has 18 times more bacteria than a public restroom. Excuse me while I never call or text anyone ever again.

1. Elago Matrix Case $12.99

2. Kate Spade Cake For Breakfast Case/Charger Combo $120

3. Nasty Gal Sweet Talk Case $20

4. Jordan Carlyle Yang Case $35

5. Marc by Marc Jacobs Faceted Case $40

6. Ban.Do Case $25

7. Star Gazer Case $32

8. Corners4 Case $40

9. White Marble Case $19.99

10. Elago Genuine Leather Case $24.99

11. Agate Case $23.95

12. J. Crew Bonjour Case $14.99

13. Kate Spade Scallop Case $35

14. Nasty Gal Pineapple Case $20

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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