Heater, Mother of Lance

The best and worst of times

Last month when I mentioned that the dogs destroy every toy they play with someone named Ashley reached out to me on twitter and directed me to a frisbee that she had bought her dog a year and a half ago. It’s the only toy he hasn’t destroyed, so I read some reviews and decided to try it out. I bought a large orange frisbee and a small “Zogoflex” bone (not pictured) and held my breath. How many minutes would it take for Coco to puncture this thing and arrange all the tiny pieces into the figure of a person making the jerk off motion?

It’s been a month! A whole month! Yes, it’s dirty. It’s filthy. If you wash your dog toys you get a cookie. BUT IT IS INTACT. Not a single indentation from a canine tooth anywhere. I have very gladly not found fragments of orange frisbee in her poop.

The down side: because this toy has lasted so long we all play fetch with her more often. So she sits at the back door and whines. UGH. Won’t someone, anyone throw it for her just one more time? Do they make a tennis ball machine for dog frisbees?

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Heather B. Armstrong

Hi. I’m Heather B. Armstrong, and this used to be called mommy blogging. But then they started calling it Influencer Marketing: hashtag ad, hashtag sponsored, hashtag you know you want me to slap your product on my kid and exploit her for millions and millions of dollars. That’s how this shit works. Now? Well… sit back, buckle up, and enjoy the ride.

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