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How to Charm Me into a Gobsmacked Sober Stupor

HOLY. SHIT. Thank you to anyone and everyone who voted for me in the 2005 Bloggies. I am completely surprised and delighted and astounded and trying to overcome my disbelief at winning those categories especially considering the company I was in. I ususally try to ignore these competitions if only because I don’t do this [...]

The SAT Reasoning Test was WAY easier than this

“What does she have in her mouth?” “A bag of Saltine crackers.” “Why did you give her a bag of Saltine crackers?” “I didn’t give them to her.” “How did she get them, then?” “She crawled over to the diaper bag while I was putting on my coat and when I returned she had them [...]

When this happens, you take the LOOOOONG way home

I am a Conk Honk Ronk I Sonk Tonk I A Nonk

Patatomic and Rebecca

She can sing Lionel Richie songs with me. I love her.

Good Dog Carl Goes to Prison

During the first year of my relationship with Jon we often discussed the option (necessity) of having children. He dropped hints that he liked kids by telling stories about his many nephews and nieces and by mentioning how much he loved Good Dog Carl books. My way of showing that I wanted kids was slightly [...]

File under: Not for kids

Yesterday my mother called to see how Leta was doing and before I would let her hang up I blurted out, “I just think you should know that I have a cyst on the back of my knee. And it’s infected.” “Oh?” she asked. “Cysts run in the family. Your grandmother has them removed from [...]

Here, kitty kitty!

Lance Armstrong

This afternoon I am getting a marble-sized cyst on the back of my knee lanced. The problem is that when I talk about it I keep saying that I have to get my lance cysted. Have you cysted your lance today? Beth and I were talking on the phone yesterday and I mentioned that I [...]

The camera took this picture by itself, I just stood there