• you’re too skinny

    I got a six week old puppy yesterday. I can not stop looking at her. Now I understand why you take so many dog pictures.

  • Kelly B

    When my first dog was a puppy she ate my ipod. For some reason AppleCare didn’t cover that sort of damage.

    She still has a fondness for my bras. I want to buy some nice expensive bras that will actually hold me up, but I don’t want $60 to go the way of her razor teeth.

  • Bonzai

    Woman, have you looked carefully at that picture? You can TOTALLY pull off a hat – no tequila required. Someone should be able to – I always feel like Bill Murray in “Caddyshack” when I put one on.

    Puppies, puppies. At least your spouse doesn’t look at you, as you hold the remnants of your beloved 17-year-old perfectly broken in bomber jacket in your hands, tears streaming down your face, and say, wonderingly, “But I thought it was fine – he was so quiet!”

  • http://misstraceynolan.blogspot.com misstraceynolan

    Dude, you can wear the shit out of that hat.

  • marie


    I was already attached to that hat, I was. Damn.

  • Marie

    Could you not make your blogs so laugh out loud funny. My boss is going to realize one of these days that I get my work done in 2 hours and then piss around for the other 6 haha. Thanks for the laugh. :)

  • http://freaktothefunk.blogspot.com/ fancy ham

    I’m confused about the mormon adds, are they actually paying you to advertise?Shouldn’t that money be going towards temples? I too lived the young woman values, which are; faith, divine nature, individual worth, knowledge, choice and accountability, good works, and integrity. IT NEVER GOES AWAY!!

  • http://www.freeformkatia.com freeformkatia

    how devastating. I understand about hats — I love to wear them but feel very self-conscious about it. Then I plug in to my iPod and groove my way home… and forget all about the hat, because now people are staring at me because I’m singing at the top of my lungs. The hat is the least of my worries.

    Hope you can find a replacement.

  • http://www.brwr.blogspot.com Madeline

    omfg, hilarious. I have been meaning to ask “why is the leash always attached to Coco?” and now I know. =)

  • http://chopstickbunny.blogspot.com Angela

    WHEW. Thanks for reminding me just insanely lucky I got with my puppy who really showed no interest in chewing things what were not specifically made to be chewed or going potty when it wasn’t potty time. I will read this when I get another But I Want Another Puppy urge. Well. Who am I kidding. I still want another puppy. I want to adopt all the puppies in the world, even the really old ones and they can chew whatever they want.

  • http://dailypiglet.wordpress.com/ piglet

    i’m not drunk right now and i think you look like a movie star (in the old way that was cool and stylish) in that hat.

    i have that same kind of skin, it sucks to be called “boy in the bubble” as others watch me mummify myself in order to not be touched by the sun.

  • http://jumpwithfaith.blogspot.com Kim

    My greyhound got into a paint tray with just enough paint left in it to get on his nose, legs and feet, which was then tracked onto the kitchen floor, the kitchen rugs, my couch and the new doggie bed I just bought him. He is lucky to be alive.

  • http://www.westcovinacriminaldefenselawyer.com LA Lawyer

    What the heck? Coco needs some Pepto Bismo.

  • Annemarie

    I feel like an absolute idiot in a hat, but you look lovely.
    Puppies are so not fun sometimes.

  • http://www.gorkyrises.com Gorky

    My son and our dog, Jules, grew up together as puppies. Of course, the four-legged puppy was more ambulatory and far more destructive than the two-legged puppy for many years. Now the four-legged puppy is 15 years old – wise and slow. The two legged puppy is 18 and reminds me of the young four-legged puppy. Often he is fondly referred to by my wife and I as “the retard”.

    I know it’s not PC – but you know that look Coco gave you when you found her with bits of hat hanging from her mouth? Imagine that look from an 18 year old boy.

  • Emily

    Sweet Lord, that is hilarious.

  • http://www.jimmyfromshinagawa.blogspot.com James

    Hahahaha.. brilliant.. EXCEPT the title gave it all away!

  • http://www.livinginthegray.com/ Shannon

    I actually looked at the picture of you in the hat and thought “Wow, she looks good in that hat. I should try a hat sometime, as I am half a sunburn away from starting my own little collection of skin cancer.” I have had similar feelings about hats as what you described. But you give me hope!

  • http://queenofthedorks.blogspot.com Terry

    That IS…er, I mean, WAS… a great hat. Looked great on you (and I’ve only had one glass of wine).


  • http://iwrotethat.wordpress.com Mariah

    coco ate the hat? the whole hat? i know your seat mate had to have felt the world slow down just a little as coco chomped away on the reason he won’t fly from ps to slc again.

  • http://isthatnatural.wordpress.com Allie

    Guess you know what she thought of the hat.

  • Benschomatic

    I wore a cheap straw cowboy hat home to Chicago from California (during a rather frigid March.) Yes, my head got cold on the way home from the airport. I did propose to my wife while wearing that hat, so I guess it was a worthy souvenir to hold on to. I have since lost it.

    I have not lost much to Floyd, our resident destroyer (8 month old fox terrier/Italian greyhound mix – yes, he’s as terrifying and cute as that mix would indicate.) I keep my treasured items well out of his reach. My wife on the other hand has lost a NUMBER of things to this 15-pound monster. Now in a 21-day doggy “bootcamp”, I have a feeling our trainer may not be able to come up with a command that keeps Floyd from eating the crotch portions from my wife’s maternity undies or chewing the zippers (and just the zippers) from all of her clothing items.

  • SwissBarb

    OMG naughty Coco! This is so funny!
    Er, I meant, sorry about your hat! *grins*

  • sally

    That is just too funny. Dogs. Ours puked in two different spots this morning – he just had to lick his paws.

  • Calligirl

    The hat looked great on your Heather; naughty Coco. I’m ashamed she has the word ‘Australian’ in her (breed) name. Visit the land Downunder, where there are more cases of skin cancer per capita than elsewhere on the planet, and you won’t need margaritas to get through wearing a large hat – everyone does it; it’s even a mandatory school uniform item in most schools.
    Better cute in a hat than the alternative!

  • http://www.basicallyunemployable.blogspot.com Barb

    I worked as a dog-walker for awhile. My little doggie friend ate a sock. I didn’t see it going in, but….

    The hat was fab. Hope you can replace it.

  • http://www.countingthethingsiknow.blogspot.com lu

    golden and freaking hilarious!

  • Shell Smith

    It took me a few seconds to realize that was your straw hat.

    I ate a straw hat once myself. I was extremely hungry, and I regretted it immediately.

    :) Geez Heather that stinks but you’re a saint for not eating coco for dinner. Sorry that you felt liberty to sleep in – please don’t let this taint your morning freedom!

  • Kirsten

    Not that I think you’re going to get through 2 pages of comments, but I just wanted to add that at least Coco only ate a straw hat.

    My mom came home one day to find that our Cocker Spaniel Laddie had licked her diamond solitaire earrings off of the dresser. Yes. He swallowed them. Yes. She was on poop patrol for the next week. Yes. She got the earrings back.

  • http://fatandscrappy.blogspot.com Kim Langston

    Don’t you just love puppies!?!?!?!? Of course you are much more diligent with your puppy and poop training than I am with mine. While Coco may prefer your wonderful hat. My Pearl tends to favor Rolaids gum, well all gum basically, and Gorilla Glue. Nice.

  • http://www.imaveg.blogspot.com/ plue

    This reminds me of the time I was in Tokyo, Japan and I bought this gorgeous paper pinwheel at a street fair. I wanted to bring it home to show my mom, so I carefully shielded it during the entire fair, which was chock-full of people. People whose elbows kept threatening to damage the delicate petals of this pinwheel. I held onto it tightly and for so long that my fingers hurt and I had a mini heart attack every time someone came near me. I was lucky enough on the way home to find a seat on the train because during rush hour, people are literally crammed into every available crevice by uniformed people-crammers. And wouldn’t you know it, halfway into the train ride, an old lady tripped and toppled over and, you guessed it, fell right on my pinwheel.

  • http://www.intimateherbs.com Ciara

    Coco is required to make at least 1 sacrifice to the Puppy Gods every month. Boy is she thankful you brought her that hat all the way from sunny CA because it was either the hat or John’s clogs- and we all know how disappointed you would be to see those coming out the other end.


  • Ellen

    OH, that was the hat? Yikes. I thought those were feathers from the dog bed.

    In that case, RIP hat. It didn’t deserve such a fate. :(