• Liz

    In the 6th grade, my teacher basically stopped grading my english assignments and gave me some weird random english book from the 1950s or something, and i started to diagram sentences to my hearts desire. so you can call her “your little nerd” if you want, b/c face it, that’s what she is. (and clearly from this post, i’ve done away with much of what we like to call “grammar”.)

  • http://vocabularyvixen.wordpress.com Rachel

    Leta sounds wonderful. I can only hope that my own (possibly growing) spawn has just as big a thirst for knowledge as Leta. I was ahead of the game at that age, but not as far as Leta. ;-)

  • Liz

    to cattitude-

    if it’s of any hope to you, i have an older brother who sounds a lot like your son and what you’re going through, and he came out okay, all things considered. it sucks and unfortunately b/c of his age and his own issues with life…well, yeah, it’s probably just going to suck for awhile. just realize that your son is his own person and is responsible for his own decisions. and it might take him a little longer than you like for him to realize the consequences for his decisions. anyway…good luck, and i’m sure he knows you love him.

  • http://lucidrealmsdotcom.blogspot.com Katina

    When I was in 6th grade my mom let my best friend come stay with us for a week during the summer break. She brought like 20 Nancy Drew books, and got out my 20 and we spent the entire week reading. That’s right. We spent our God-given summer break reading.

    God, I was such a nerd..

  • linuxchik

    great post! ribbons and bubbles!

  • http://contentcreation.com.au mass content creation

    Aah the illustrious snooze button. Has taken many women better than me.

    Good laugh… as usual.

    Thanks Dooce.

  • http://princessgreen17.blogspot.com Lydia L Miller

    I hope I never have boys! I do hope my girls are slightly nerdy, though. Your masthead this month is very pretty!

  • Stella

    you actually make me want to have kids and me wanting kids-ever- is a rare moment. your stories about her make me smile. thanks!

  • http://lilliansdiary.blogspot.com Lillian

    LOL. Dooce, I love you.

  • Jeanne

    am i the 1st or millionth that has said it should be “Mayan”?

    cheers! i had a bottle of wine tonight, i hope i wrote that corrcetly!

  • http://laughingthroughthechaos.blogspot.com Sera @ Laughing Through the Chaos

    I absolutely loved this post. Our one-year-old is notorious for setting her alarm for some ungodly middle-of-the-night hour because she loves to push buttons. How she managed to actually set a time and turn on the alarm in her random pushing of buttons is beyond us. But after it happened twice, we finally moved it to the top of the dresser where she can no longer touch it.

  • http://www.lovemaegan.com …love Maegan

    oooh …look at your new disco header …and just in time for may! fab. I have to go back and read now.

  • http://www.lovemaegan.com …love Maegan

    well, that’s exactly what I do every morning when my alarm goes off

  • http://heymrswilson.net Mrs. Wilson

    I love how you piece things together. Your daughter is definitely a blog-worthy individual.

    As usual, love the new header!

  • Becky Young

    My daughter Halley was a kindergarten reader, too. I have a picture of her that year where she’s leaned all her Laura Ingalls Wilder books against the TV and she’s pointing to them like she’s Vanna White.

    My friend Sid started a book group for a group of our daughters when Halley was in fifth grade. Her daughter was in middle school. There was a three- or four-year age range. I think they met all the way through high school.

    Sid used to call them our happy, little nerds.

    I’d post a picture of my daughter if I could. She’s 23, a newspaper reporter and gorgeous. All those girls are, and accomplished in a number of areas.

    (But I know you’re not seriously worried about the nerd thing.)

  • http://www.ozma.blogs.com ozma

    I think of my child as ‘my little weirdo.’ And like you, I shocked some adult by proudly saying: “My kid is weird.” She has many different personalities. She asks questions like: “What if everyone dies? What if everyone in the whole world dies.”

    Then if we say–this won’t happen she is like: But WHAT IF IT DID? Also, what if people stopped giving birth? Like she’s already envisioning the post-apocalyptic future.

    I think a nerd has more income potential than a weirdo but it is one of those amazing things when you see that apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree and your child is going to be listening to whatever version of Joy Division they have in 2020.

  • Dora

    She’s like Roald Dahl’s Matilde. Can she move stuff with her eyes as well?

  • Anonymous
  • Margie

    You should introduce Leta to the Ramona book series by Beverly Cleary . . she would love them I am sure.
    Ramona Age 8 is a good one !! You will find her sitting quiety reading and giggling every so often with these :)
    Happy Reading Leta !!! (by the way, my older sister was/is a reader, now a doctor and I am the 2nd child and was/is nothing like her at all!! I was my parents challenge for many years!! only warning you about the “2nd child” syndrome :)

  • http://shainamaydel.blogspot.com Shaina

    *raises hand* I’m another Sesame Street reader! My mom is a librarian and always read to me, but never did any sort of focused teaching; I watched Sesame Street religiously, though, and one day when I was about 4.5 I pointed to a word and said “does that say doctor?” and of course it did. I used to go straight to the book corner in my preschool/kindergarten…I even have a picture of me reading to my pre-k class…
    Of course, I was never into non-fiction, so I dunno if I can really classify as a nerd although I’m good at math and science as well. I’m a proud romance novel junkie, have been since age 11 (yes, I brought romance novels to sixth grade. My grandma still thinks it’s scandalous!), and only rarely venture into other genres. During middle school and high school, and during breaks from college, it’s not unusual for me to go through a book or two a day. In middle school I once read 800 pages in one summer day!

    Anyways, enough about me. This post made me literally laugh out loud, which doesn’t happen a lot for me in general! I’m so glad Leta’s off to a such a great start, I hope she sticks with it…

  • Australia

    This is going to sound random but I just had a thought. You need to call this baby Maya. Leta and Maya. Works. Think about it. Word.

  • http://www.tokenblogger.com tokenblogger

    Look at that new masthead! It’s all about embracing the pink!

  • http://www.zelzee.com/ zelzee

    And I’m sure you aren’t finished finding all the things those two were into.

    Wait until you start looking for a spatuala……….

  • Kathy

    I am in LOVE with your blog. You’re such a good writer.

    I’m curious as to how you think Leta’s going to react to the new little bean when she arrives? Do you think she’s going to be jealous? Is she excited? Does she know what’s about to happen?

    Ah, I run from THAT NOIIIISE every morning at 5 a.m., Monday through Friday too.


  • http://dancinginthemoonlight-dee.blogspot.com/ Dee

    I think it’s great she’s so excited about reading and learning. I was too…I wanted a microscope when I was little I was so excited about science.

    My 6th grade teacher once called my mother into the office to tell her I’d never amount to anything because I always had my nose in a book. Ummm okay? Apparently after all my work was done in class, I’d read instead of talking and getting yelled at so that was deemed bad.

  • http://retardedinlove.com Michelle

    Well, 6AM is better than 3AM, right? Much closer to 7.

  • KT

    We are hoping that our 2 1/2 year old and baby #2 on the way will turn out to be huge nerds. The nerds are more likely to be home on a Saturday night then out roaming the streets as teenagers. Is there a parenting book on how to raise a nerd??

  • TheOtherJennifer

    My daughter is a geek too, happily. Yesterday she was reading the thesaurus.

  • Anonymous

    I was a dainty little nerd myself… Reading at three and whatnot. I hope to whatever deity that’s in charge that my 2 year old becomes that kid- I think we are on our way, with the obsession with dinosaurs and their proper names. Ever hear a 2 year old say “pterosaurs”? It’s really cute, I swear. And I get that look for calling mine a monkey, a pumpkin,or a turkey, or a turd. Because that’s just how I show affection.

  • http://www.livefromthefence.blogspot.com Kami Lewis Levin

    I love asking my three year old son for the answers to questions that are clearly better left unasked simply because the creativity with which he answers is awesome, not to mention entertaining.

    And about the alarm, when we were having 4am wake up issues, we gave him an alarm clock that played Puff the Magic Dragon when it was time to wake up. “I hear Puff! I hear Puff!” he would yell from his room. I much preferred it to “THAT NOIIISE!”

  • SuzieQ

    Late poster
    We caught our son, not once but twice, reading in the middle of the night (with a flashlight) the answers to “Trivial Pursuit” and “Masterminds”, games we played fairly regularly back then. He was 12 and would read pretty much anything unless it was assigned reading ~ sigh.

    It’s true. Now at 28 y.o., he is a very good writer, with a very good vocabulary, except when he’s around his buds, then he reverts to ghetto-mode. We tried to explain to him that this isn’t what is daughter should see, but we keep forgetting that he knows everthing. I mean, what 6 y.o. should seen Hellboy???? Jeez.

    My advise is simple, let Leta read as much as she wants, throw in some fashion books, and hide all of the flashlights.

    Good luck. ;)

  • http://thedrennans.blogspot.com Kristi

    Oooooooh that noise! Makes my heart stop. Even when my husband sets it for himself I still feel that panic of “gotta get up” until I realize it’s not for me and then I slip back into blissful sleep. And then two mintues passes and it goes off again because he hit snooze. Again, back to sleep. After five snooze hits later I finally get to fall back to sleep. And then I hear it….the kid yelling for me to come get him. Unfortunately I haven’t figured out the kid snooze button yet.

  • Janie

    God, I just love that little kid, I really do.
    Go Leta! Books are the best! I was a voracious reader who never wanted to sleep ever. For my fifth birtday I wanted a real flashlight and no one could figure out why….to read under the covers at night and not have to hold the button down on my tiny keychain flashlight (it hurt like hell after a while). I would be up at 5AM looking for books and all I could find were the classics..you know the fancy gold-embossed ones your mom got back in the day at the grocery store with special coupons? I can remember reading Tom Sawyer and not knowing what half the words meant. LOL and I had two much older sisters and I read Love Story, Fear of Flying and the Happy Hooker before I was 10!

    Luckily Leta lives in a more evolved time…ooh and she has computers, how exciting. When I was a kid in the 60s, you couldn’t get a card for the ‘grown up’ part of the library until you were in 7th grade! I was stuck with awful baby books that took 5 minutes to get through. Needless to say, I spent all day in the adult section reading books I couldn’t take home. To this day, my mother insists that’s why I’m so pale skinned LOL.

  • http://www.areyoubreathing.com/ wendy@areyoubreathing.com

    Yeah drug dealers are so much easier to deal with than kids, except the gun part.

  • Stephanie

    I like the new masthead!

  • http://www.emilyweaverbrownphoto.com/blog Emily Weaver Brown

    I can barely keep “the blast radius of destruction” under control for a single one year old – I can’t imagine how bad it’s going to get if I have more than one boy. Thanks for the story this was hilarious.

  • http://thaxtonfam.blogspot.com Deb

    –>Oh my goodness, that made me laugh. Thanks for being such an excellent story-teller.

  • http://www.hikooky.blogspot.com hi kooky


  • Clair

    As a mother of a 13 month old boy, I can totally vouch for that statement. He is a 22 pound tornado. Cabinets, drawers and shelves are cleared out onto to the floor within minutes. He has no interest in toys, only chemical laden products. Which he proceeds to put in his mouth. I use to run after him and pick up everything 374893619 times a day. Now, as long as he’s not bleeding or on fire, I let him do whatever he wants.

  • http://www.repliderium.com repliderium.com

    I love that you’re raising a nerd. And I think she’s probably going to be a pretty smokin’ hot one too. You guys are in trouble.

  • Natasha

    I recently discovered your blog and i have to admit i find it very entertaining and informative. I spend most of my lunch hour reading your older posts.

    I have an 8 month old daughter, and I’m sure you are going to be a very big help in how she is raised.

    Keep up the great job!!!!!!!!

  • http://www.mandinka.etsy.com Mandinka

    Dooce, you rock.
    (smooches to Chuckles)

  • http://gavmenagerie.blogspot.com Kimberly

    This is so funny and true. My daughter has 2 best friends in her preK and we often do playdates with both at the same time. The destruction from three little bodies is awe inspiring.

    And “That noise! That noise!” is exactly what I think every morning myself. Once it starts, it never ends.

  • http://wisdomofthemoon.blogspot.com/ Wendy

    I’m totally proud of nerdiness. Reminds me of something I saw somewhere, which said, “Let Your Geek Flag Fly”. Our 10 year old stays up late watching archeology lectures with us. But we homeschool, so she doesn’t have to get up early in the mornings. And she will sit and read for 5 hours easily if I let her. We usually have at least 30 books each checked out from the library. And her dad has made it to the second round of tryouts for Jeopardy, so we are a nerdy nerdy family.

  • http://meandyouandellie.blogspot.com/ Jacquie

    When we tried that clock number trick with my daughter, she asked me to write down the number so she’d remember. I wrote 7:00. the next morning, I was so smug when all was quiet until well past 7, and then I heard her crying in her room… I went in and she was sobbing on her bed with the 7:00 note clutched in her sweaty palm. She had to pee really really badly but the clock never said 7:00! It said 7:04!

  • Dee

    As a 40-something who detests alarm clocks, I’m reminded of the time in college when I had (once again) overslept and missed class. My roommate later told me that when my alarm had gone off, I fumbled for the snooze button. Not finding it, I yanked the plug out of the outlet and went back to sleep. Would’ve been nice if she had opted to wake me up, huh?

    Anyway, kudos to raising such a great kid! Good luck with the next one!

  • Em

    Learning to read early was seriously the only way I survived childhood. As the youngest of three, I was always relegated The Hump in between my sister and brother in the backseat on whatever hair brained family roadtrip we embarked upon.

    Losing myself in the pages of the Black Stallion series kept me from trying to fight back against those two idiots smushed in next to me and probably saved me from many a pummeling from either of them (and my parents).

    Reading is fundamental – to your safety – as the smallest in the backseat of the station wagon.

  • Sara

    My parents got my son his first alarm clock. It’s a huge interpretation of a stereotypical alarm clock with the two bells on the top and a little hammer that hits them. The night before kindergarten he was so excited to set his alarm clock and set it next to his head on the nightstand so he could wake up in time for school (my son is also a huuuuuuuuge nerd and has been from an early age). When it went off in the morning it was LOUD! He bolted out of his room, his hair heading every which way and a look of sheer panic in his eyes. He didn’t know what hit him. It was hysterical!

  • Julia

    good lord, I am slow. I just today realized that the slivers of picture open up into a full post when you click on them. I have lots of stuff to go back and read. and I think you’re probably more normal than I was thinking you were with those little snippets of picture and post.

  • http://modernmamaz.com Jennie @ Modern Mamaz

    Oh, memories! Simpler times… ain’t that the truth! I just got used to not having any middle of the night interruptions and then I went and got myself knocked up again! Oh, freedom, how I will miss you!